Dining room looking toward buffet and family room

DSCN0681, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Formerly our house consisted of a part built in 1862 and an addition built on in the 1970s. During this renovation, we gave the 1862 house a facelift, gutted and mostly redid the 1970s part, and added another addition. From this vantage point in the dining area, you can see the slate walkway between the dining area and family room. This is the 1970s portion of the house and it previously ended at the slate. There was a window there, looking out at our nonfunctional pool. This room had the large beams you see going across, but they were embedded in a drywall ceiling, so the room was very dark. Above this room was an unfinished attic. We removed the ceiling, leaving the beams, and added a wood ceiling with skylights. Now the room is light and bright!

Halloween 2007

DSCN0661, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here they are: Burger King, a Deviless, a wacky lady, Santa, and the fairy princess. L. had already left and is not in the photo, but he was a party animal, which consisted of a monkey mask wearing a hat that said party animal. He trick or treated with a friend whose older brother drove them around in a golf cart, resulting in WAY too much candy being acquired.

The 3 girls walked around together, and Daryl and I took the 2 little ones around riding in their wagon. A's fairy princess dress was a tad too long, so she had to be helped up the steps to every porch so she wouldn't fall. The Santa costume, chosen by K., and which I thought would be hard to find in a small size but I luckily stumbled on one at Babies R Us, turned out to be the biggest hit. People thought it was hilarious and very original.

Despite having my membranes stripped that afternoon and doing a lot of walking, the evening only resulted in too much candy, no baby.

Last Friday, 9 days after Halloween, I tossed all remaining candy due to sugar poisoning. I tired of the crying over wanting more candy, and complete meltdowns over wanting candy for breakfast. I honestly think that the more they ate the worse they behaved. Even J., 13, said some nasty things about how mean I am for throwing it out. Today, after several days of detox, they seem to be back to their sweet selves.

38 week bellly with henna tattoo

38 week bellly with henna tattoo, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I had this done last Sunday. The big flower represents me, with 7 vines for my 7 children, and the little flower at the bottom is the baby.

I also asked the priest to bless my baby on the way out of church, which he did, and it is amazing how much calmer I feel, and less obsessed with when I will give birth.

Still to Come

Later I will put up pictures of the family room, dining room, and Daryl's office, and perhaps some more bedrooms.

K and A's mural

K and A's mural, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

We had an artist paint a mural in K and A's room. I specifically wanted something outdoorsy that did not feature Disney or any other known characters. I gave him a children's book, "The Seven Silly Eaters" that i really liked the illustrations and this is what he came up with. He put in some cute touches, like the dog at the base of the tree that looks just like our dog. He also included a cat that looks like our cats, K and A have their names carved in the tree, and a bird nest with 8 baby birds. I love that personalization!

Master bathroom

Master bathroom, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is our bathroom. It is a huge upgrade, since formerly we were sharing a bathroom with all of the kids, which featured a shower with moldy grout that badly needed replacing, and one of the two mirrors in our house, a small oval one above the sink that you had to stand on the toilet to see most of yourself in.

I wanted to buy a house that had a bathroom similar to this, but Daryl convinced me to renovate our house instead. That's how the project began, with a nice bathroom.

Master bedroom

Master bedroom, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

OK, I am jumping around now, but this is our new bedroom. It is located at the far end of the house, past the sunroom, upstairs.

Den/guest room

Den/guest room, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This room was formerly our bedroom. It will now be a guest room (to the left you see glass doors going into a small adjoining room which will contain a murphy bed) and a den where Daryl could have business associates visit without walking through the entire house, as it is near the formal old front door. This room was covered in peeling blue flowered wallpaper, and had taupe carpet. In the old portion of the house the only changes we made were cosmetic--new windows for energy efficiency, refinished floors (they are fir) and fresh paint/removed wallpaper.

This is the only room that has dark trim, since it is black walnut and that is it's natural color. The walnut all came from the property when the house was built, as did the stones, which were known as "hardheads."

All of the extra stones you see piled around the property, as well as those used in the various terraces and retaining walls, were here on the property. We didn't have to buy any. Those used in the exterior of the new portion of the house we did purchase, as they are cut stones.

Paula's "office"

Paula's "office", originally uploaded by PaulaK.

There are 2 small sitting rooms in the downstairs of the old portion of the house. This one, adjacent to the kitchen, is "command central", otherwise known as Paula's office.

Rear view: old part and sunroom

Rear view: old part and sunroom, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Another view from the far edge of the property looking at the back of the house. The row of windows is the sunroom, and the stone part of the house is the sitting rooms downstairs and bedrooms upstairs.

rear view: old part, sunroom and patio

rear view: old part, sunroom and patio, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

If you are standing near the playground, you would see this view of the house. The sunroom is where the cedar posts are, and outside it is the back patio.

View from sunroom

View of playground from sunroom, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is what you'd see looking out of the sunroom in one direction.--our new playground! Fifteen years of having kids, and we've never had a play structure of any kind.

Sunroom looking out at back patio

Sunroom looking out at back patio, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

If you stand at the other end of the sunroom, you see out the windows and doors.

Sunroom facing old part of house

Sunroom facing old part of house, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

If you stand at one end of the sunroom, you see another stone wall, adjacent to the one in the kitchen. Or the right past the kitchen windows is the doorway to the kitchen.

Sunroom looking into Kitchen

Sunroom facing Kitchen windows, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I am going to try and give a "tour" that makes a little sense. Since we've already seen the kitchen, if you stepped from there into the sunroom this is what you'd see when looking toward the kitchen. The floor is slate, and the stone wall is formerly an exterior wall.

My favorite gadget

My favorite gadget, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

But my favorite kitchen gadget is this--not the mixer itself, but the pullout shelf. The mixer stays sitting on it, and it drops down into that cabinet when not in use. Then it springs up and locks into place while being used.

Refrigerators and dishwasher

Refrigerators and dishwasher, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This side of the kitchen, which looks into the sunroom, has the appliances, which have cabinet faces on them. The tall unit on the far left is a refrigerator, and to the left of the sink to the right of the photo (with the horizontal handle) is a dishwasher. There is another dishwasher on the other side of the sink. I LOVE having 2 dishwashers. My sink is never full of dirty dishes, and I rarely wash pots and pans, since the racks are adjustable and I just throw them in the dishwasher.

Prep sink and range hood

Prep sink and range hood, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

We have a small prep sink next to the stove.

View from new part of house

View from new part of house, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

If you are standing in front of the new staircase, this is your view. Now the sunroom is on the left, dining room on the right. In front of you is the stone wall, which is the former exterior of the 1862 portion of the house.

View from old part of house

View from old part of house, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

If you are standing in front of the stone wall in the kitchen looking toward the new addition, this is your view. Dining room/bar on left, sunroom on right.

Kitchen sink

Kitchen sink, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is the view from the raised bar/dining room side, looking at the other side of the kitchen. The window you see is looking into a sunroom.

Moving

On Sept. 22 we moved back into our home, after NINE loooong months of living in a rental house while our dear old (1862) house got a facelift, makeover, and an addition built onto it. Since then, we have had continual construction work and painting being done both inside and out, because it wasn't complete when we moved in. It is really lovely, better than I could ever have imagined, and we are so blessed. That is not to say that my patience isn't worn a little thin as we enter the 5th week of living with construction--the noise, dirt and invasion of privacy are hard to take, especially at 8.5 months pregnant. After the rest of this week, and maybe one more week, they should be (mostly) done.

I'll include some photos now, and more in a day or 2.

Anniversary Celebration

In late August Daryl and I went away together to New York City for 3 glorious days to celebrate our 20th anniversary, which was in May. We had a fabulous time, better than our honeymoon. It wasn't so much what we did, but rather the time spent together. It was a true celebration of our love and friendship.

Some of the things we did, in case anyone is interested, were:
Carriage ride (and lots of walking) in Central Park
Shopping
Eating out
Saw the play Wicked on Broadway
Chinatown
Spent the evening with dear friends that live an hour's train ride away in CT (they came to the city to be with us)

The kids had a fine time at home with a rotating crew of grandparents, their 26 year old cousin, and a babysitter. We were gone just long enough to miss them, yet not to actually wish they were with us!

36 weeks

36 weeks, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

And from the front!

36 weeks

36 weeks, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here's a couple of belly shots.

Pregnant from behind

pregnant from behind, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Someone asked if I look pregant from behind, so here I am at almost 32 weeks. You be the judge.

31 week belly

31 week belly, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Wearing the traditional birthday hat

DSCN0317, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Wearing this hat is a tradition in our family. My birthday was spent visiting my nephew to celebrate his birthday, which is the same day as mine, and later, Daryl brought home carryout ribs and a fabulous cake (which I'd ordered for myself). It was a nice day.

24 week belly

24 weeks, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Birthday blogger

Birthday blogger, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here I am on my 43rd bday, Aug. 2.

Wild Hair

Wild Hair, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Did I say the ferry ride was windy?

Dh and I

Dh and I, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Taken on the windy ferry ride back to the mainland.

All of Us

All of Us, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here we are, at the end of the vacation (Fort Michilimackinac in the background) ready to go home.

Mackinac Island

Mackinac Island, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

After we left the beach house, we spent a couple of days on Mackinac Island, a quaint vacation spot where there are no vehicles allowed except fire trucks and ambulances. Even the trash is removed by horse drawn cart. So carriage rides abound, as do bicycles. The island is known for great views, famous fudge and horses. There is lots of touristy shopping and a historic fort as well.

Skipping stones

DSCN0194, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This was another favorite activity. We even had a contest one afternoon.

Studly physique

DSCN0200, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Or to be 15 again! Here is D, our oldest.

Fun in the Sand

DSCN0199, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

The little ones enjoyed the sand. Here is A, playing away.

Bathing Beauty

DSCN0206, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Ah, to be 13 again! J, looking lovely as always.

Chilly

Chilly, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

They swam even when Daryl and I were wearing sweatshirts! Brrr...

Here is L, emerging from the water.

Playing in the Waves

Playing in the Waves, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

The kids had a great time in the "surf."

Beautiful Sunsets

DSCN0209, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

We rented a house on the beach of Lake Michigan, in northern Michigan near Petoskey and Harbor Springs, where we enjoyed beautiful sunsets.

Rig is ready to roll

DSCN0153, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I am doing some extreme catch-up, so bear with me.

Here we are, almost ready to leave for vacation on July 7.

Great News

Less than a week after my last post, requesting potty training help, my dd A decided to start using the potty! She went from refusing to consider it to totally trained in less than a week. I created a sticker reward chart for her, and for her brother K, where they received a prize after 3 BMs. Unbelievably, her "output" in the initial weeks of potty training increased, and she was getting a prize daily! I hoped it would influence K, and he did start trying more, but had no success. I began feeling sorry for him. After about 2 weeks, he did it! Two days in a row, he had a BM in the toilet. Daryl and I were not sure that it was totally intentional, because he made remarks that led us to believe he was somewhat surprised. Nonetheless, he received prizes (his sister can't really count and we wanted to reward his success) and a HUGE fuss was made. Then he had several accidents in a row. One day I went to the health club, and he had an accident at the child care center there, but it was a tiny amount and I knew he was holding it. Later in the day, as we were preparing to go to the movies to see Ratatouille, I instructed him to try again, but he refused, and a few minutes later had another accident, again only a small amount. As a consequence, I left him at home with an older sibling, my heart breaking at his tears, but I felt that since he refused to try and he clearly still had to go, he was literally an accident waiting to happen. I did explain my reasons for leaving him. The next day he went on the toilet, and he clearly knew it was going to happen and went in to the bathroom, unannounced and without prompting. It was a breakthrough moment. He hasn't had an accident since!

We cancelled his appointment with the special clinic, which was supposed to be Aug. 28, because he had been accident free for almost a week at that time, and was going frequently, not just every 2-3 days. It was a bold move, because we made that appt. 6 weeks earlier, but we were not disappointed.

Clearly, he wasn't really ready before, although I just couldn't accept/believe that. Hopefully our next child won't have this problem, but if it should happen again, I will remember this with more patience.

Those first few weeks of 2 newly potty trained kids were exhausting--I was spending a huge amount of time in the bathroom, either just being there, or wiping, cleaning the little potty, etc. I actually wondered if I should have been more careful what I wished for! Now, however, life is SO easy with all of my children potty trained! We got rid of the little potty when we moved, so we don't have to deal with that anymore. Our next challenge will be teaching them to wipe themselves! And of course, going back to diapers when the baby arrives.

Thanks to everyone who shared their experiences and advice with me. It was nice to know that I wasn't alone or doing something "wrong"!

Potty Training Help Needed!

As I alluded to in my last post, K. has a problem. He absolutely refuses to have a BM in the toilet. He has done it 2-3 times in his life, but not recently. We have been working at this with him for the past 18 months. We have tried offering every reward and enforcing every punishment, including spanking and other things I don't believe in, that you can imagine. We have gone through months of ignoring it with the idea that he is seeking attention. We have tried pullups and underwear. He has been examined by the pediatrician, who didn't find anything physically wrong.

At this point, when he soils himself he is instructed to change and wipe himself as best he can, and then he takes a shower to clean off anything he missed. This was the suggestion of the child development clinic at the local hospital. We are not currently doing any discipline with him, as this was causing him to hold it.

He usually sneaks off to do the deed, and then informs us. He has told me that it comes out more easily if he is walking around. He has also asked me, "how do you push your poop out?" I can't figure out if he really doesn't know what to do or not.

Later this month he has an appointment with an encopresis clinic. Encopresis is involuntary soiling in children caused by holding it and/or constipation. Even if a child goes regularly, he can still have hard impacted stool in his colon.

I am feeling very frustrated for several reasons. K's 2 year old sister, who emulates him in every way possible, is beginning to potty train. She has been peeing in the potty, but when she poops, she hides, and the past few days she when she has a BM, she takes off her diaper and attempts to clean herself! This results in her smearing it all over herself! I had really hoped that they would both be potty trained by November when I am due to have a baby. At this rate, I will be changing 3 kids, one of them WAY too big for this! I had also hoped to send them both to preschool, which requires that they be potty trained.

Has anyone out there had an experience like this? People keep telling me to be patient and it will eventually "happen" but I am not seeing any signs of progress. He is just becoming more proficient at cleaning himself up. I'd appreciate any advice.

Four!

K. turned 4 on June 20. He is a bright, sweet happy little guy. He chose a spectacularly unhealthy birthday menu of: Reese's peanut butter cereal for breakfast, Lunchable for lunch, and hotdogs for dinner. Ugh. He survived the food, as did the rest of us. He got his first two wheeler for his birthday.

At the moment, K. has only one stumbling block in his life...

D's bday

His birthday was June 5, and he turned 15. As my oldest child, he really shows leadership with his siblings. He is usually helpful and rarely complains. He is a straight A student as well as a talented multi-sport athlete: football, basketball, and track. This means that he has practice and/or games afterschool year round, with the exception of a handful of days. He handles this with ease, actually making it seem easy. He is never late, and never forgets things.

He just completed driver's ed, and was eligible to get his permit. Unfortunately I recently misplaced his birth certificate, so we took a copy to get his permit. This wasn't acceptable, and they wouldn't let him get his permit. Instead of being rude, angry, or sullen,. at this turn of events, like many teens would be, he was patient and actually nice. I thought he would be angry with me for misplacing the original, but he was not. Luckily, I was able to find it and he has since obtained his permit.

If he sounds nearly perfect, it's because he is!

Back view

Back view, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I can't find a "before" back view, but this is how it is now. Previously, there was a pool where there is now house and will be patio.

Side view

Side view, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here is a side view of the house now. The red brick fireplace exterior has been refaced with stone (behind left tree), as has all of the blue siding. In the far left of the photo you will see a 3 car garage. Everything left of the main entry has is a new addition.

Oaks side view

Oaks side view, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here is a "before" picture from the side of the house, which is where we usually enter. I am standing in the parking area taking the photo. There was no garage.

The door on the left will become the main entry in the next photo.

Front view

Front view, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here is the same view (sort of). There was an addition, which wasn't really visible in that other picture. As you can see we have totally rebuilt the front porch, replaced windows and cleaned and sealed the stone.

Oaks front view

Oaks front view, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

To try and give an idea of what our home renovation/addition process has been like, here is a "before" picture of the front of the old part of the house (built in 1862).

Ready for a date

Ready for a date, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here I am, ready to go out with Daryl to see Lyle Lovett and k.d. lang in concert. It was a great show!

20 weeks

20 weeks, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Boots

Boots, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Introducing Boots! See how identical they are? I can only tell them apart by looking at their faces closely--Blaze has a small white spot on his lip.

Blaze surfing the net

Blaze surfing the net, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

He really was playing with the keyboard, but of course I wasn't fast enough to catch it!

Introducing Blaze!

Proud Mama

DSCN0019, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Our kittens are now 3 months old. They were born in March, 2 days after their earliest possible "due date." I spent a lot of time reading up on cats giving birth, and felt I was as ready as possible. Although most cats are totally independent, and some even go hide, there are others who need assistance, don't know what to do, and make mistakes. I spent several sleepless nights (I read that they are more likely to give birth at night since in the wild, this would be safest.) worrying that she was in the basement, birthing kittens in different spots and leaving them to die, or worse yet, giving birth in the litterbox and then being unwilling/unable to clean them off so they would smother in litter. (I read that this can happen with the clumping litter, if the cat mistakes her urge to push for an urge to have a BM.)

Keep in mind that this was occurring midway through the period when I believed my own pregnancy was not viable, so my mind was rather addled. I was still excited, but as I told my husband, "It was more exciting when we were both pregnant."

She became EXTREMELY friendly and affectionate during this time, and we all doted on her.

At one point during her pregnancy she developed a skin disorder and I took her to the vet, who said it was allergies and confirmed that she was definitely pregnant. She also informed me that it was not too late to "take care of it" by spaying her and aborting the kittens. She even offered me a surgery appointment the next morning. Although I knew that Daryl was not in favor of her having kittens, I could not bring myself to do this. When she got to 2 weeks from her due date, I informed the kids. She was noticeably pregnant by this time, but they just thought she was getting fat. Daryl didn't find out for another week, since he was out of town. By that point she looked as though she had a bowling ball strapped to her middle, but he still didn't notice!

One morning she began having contractions. Instead of hiding, she was sitting in L's lap (he was home sick from school). I removed her and took her to the box I'd prepared in my bathroom. She was anxious, meowing frequently, but as long as I stayed by her side and kept petting her she was ok. I left the room for 2-3 minutes, and when I returned she had had a kitten, left it in the box, and was at the door meowing for me. I quickly picked it up, wiped it off, and called her over. She came back and did sniff at it a little and gave it a couple of tentative licks. Then, with a single growl, she gave birth to a second kitten. She began licking that one vigorously, and I kept pushing the first one under her nose. Eventually she licked them both off, although I did have to keep coaxing her to take care of the first one. She laid down, and the second kitten began nursing immediately. The first one kept rooting around, but never successfully latched on, despite my attempts to help him. She never chewed off their umbilical cords, so I cut them, since the kittens were dragging the placentas around with them.

After several hours passed and the first kitten still hadn't successfully nursed, I called the vet, who said that I should get some kitten formula and attempt to feed him, since by now his blood sugar levels would be falling dangerously low. i went out to get it, and by the time I returned, he had figured it out. I was relieved, since I wasn't really thrilled at the idea of hand feeding a kitten around the clock for weeks.

Cazzy was laying there contentedly and the kittens were nursing. Although two kittens is a small litter, that is not unusual for a first litter, particularly born to a young and small cat. I had read that kittens are usually born about 30 minutes apart (hers were 5!) and occasionally up to several hours apart, but that if the mother seemed relaxed then that was a sign it was over. She was now sleeping, and I went out to run errands. While I was gone, she had several more kittens. They were born approximately 6 hours after their littermates!

L. went in to check on her, and saw a new kitten. He called for my friend, who was babysitting. When she walked in, she saw that there were actually 2 new kittens. One looked obviously dead. She picked up the other one and wiped it off, trying to get it breathing. While she was doing that, Cazzy gave birth to another. The two that were born when no one was in the room died, but the last one lived. My friend said that it appeared that Cazzy hadn't removed all of the sac from their faces, that it was covering their mouths and may have suffocated them. Interestingly, this time she did chew through their umbilical cords.

The two that died were solid dark grey, and the 3 that lived look JUST like Cazzy, black tuxedo cats with white paws and chests. The female had a white bow tie marking over her mouth, and her 2 brothers did not. I had wondered what they would look like, and had a dream that she had 5 kittens that looked just like her, but never really believed that she would have that many kittens, or that they would look just like her.

Despite her uncertainty about what to do during the birth process, Cazzy proved to be an excellent mother. She took great care of them.

I had 3 people potentially interested in having a kitten, but only one actually did. She took the girl, and we still have the 2 boys. They are in the wild and rambunctious stage of kittenhood right now, and it's good that they have one another to wrestle with.

Cazzy has been spayed, but remains an interested and attentive mother. They still occasionally attempt to latch on, and she lets them, although she has no milk. She enjoys licking them, and sometimes holds them down to bathe them!

I lost my pictures of tiny kittens when the computer crashed, but I'll post current pictures soon.

18 weeks

DSCN0024, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here I am at 18 weeks. I have an ultrasound next week, and am praying hard that everything is OK. I feel the baby move quite a bit now, and that is comforting.

Time Consuming

Our home renovation continues, and the intensity has picked up, becoming about a 20 hour a week job for me, which is why I don't post often. My computer crashed and the data on the hard drive was irretrievable, so I lost a lot of photos. As soon as I can get some house photos from Daryl's computer I will post them.

Anniversary

Yesterday my dear husband and I celebrated 20 years of wedded bliss. I am so happy! It really doesn't seem like it's been that long.

Mother's Day Funny

I received this as a forwarded email, but I thought it was hilarious so I'm sharing:


So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just recently died.
Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him around and sit on him and
nothing ever bothered him. He used to hang out and nap all day long on this
mat in our bathroom.

Well, we have 3 kids and at the time of this story they were 4 years old, 3
years old and 1 year old. The middle one is Eli. Eli really loves chapstick.

LOVES IT. He kept asking to use my chapstick and then losing it. So finally
one day I showed him where in the bathroom I keep my chapstick and how he
could use it whenever he wanted to but he needed to put it right back in the
drawer when he was done.

Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush around
and try to get ready for Church with everyone crying and carrying on.
My two boys are fighting over the toy in the cereal box. I am
trying to nurse my little one at the same time I am putting on my make-up.
Everything is a mess and everyone has long forgotten that this is a
wonderful day to honor me and the amazing job that is motherhood. We
finally have the older one and the baby loaded in the car and I am looking
for Eli.

I have searched everywhere and I finally round the corner to go into the
bathroom. And there was Eli. He was applying my chapstick very carefully to
Jack's . . . rear end.

Eli looked right into my eyes and said "chapped."

Now if you have a cat, you know that he is right--their little butts
do look pretty chapped. And, frankly, Jack didn't seem to mind.
And the only question to really ask at that point was whether it was the
FIRST time Eli had done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth?

And THAT is my favorite Mother's Day moment ever
because it reminds us that no matter how hard we try to civilize these
glorious little creatures, there will always be that day when you realize
they've been using your chapstick on the cat's butt.

Good News

I saw the dr. again yesterday. She found the baby's heartbeat easily, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I also passed the 1 hour glucose tolerance test! For now, at least. They want me to take it again at 18 weeks, but I may argue that.

Update

I had another ultrasound one week later, and I saw the baby again. He/she had grown appropriately and the heartrate was excellent. Three days later I had a tiny bit of spotting, so I went in again, and again saw a healthy baby and heartbeat.

Since then I have had my first prenatal appointment at 9.5 weeks. My dr. wasn't able to hear the heartbeat but said that she is unconcerned because the earliest she ever hears it is usually 10 weeks, sometimes later. I am now almost 11 weeks. I have another appointment next Tuesday, when I will be 11.5 weeks, and we should definitely be able to hear it then. Surprisingly, this has not worried me much. I wish we'd heard it, but I FEEL really pregnant (nausea, fatigue) and I can tell that my uterus is growing.

If you are praying for me, please keep praying! I will update after my appointment next week.

Sorry I haven't updated much, but every time I tried to login to Blogger, I got an error message. Finally I figured out (I think) that there is some sort of incompatibility problem with the Safari browser and Blogger, so I switched to Firefox.

Miracles Do Happen!

I have some catching up to do. The bleeding I mentioned in my previous post was only spotting, and didn't last long. I went for another u/s the following Monday. We saw the sac, which had grown to about 19mm, but it was still empty. There was a blurry spot that looked like it might have been a yolk sac, but the ultrasound technician didn't think it was. She showed the films to the dr. who said that I should come back in a week for another ultrasound. He still didn't feel confident saying that the pregnancy wasn't viable. I was told to prepare for the worst, but not entirely give up hope. Later that day I spoke to the nurse practicioner who told me that the doctor said that there definitely was a yolk sac.

On Friday of that week, I called the dr.'s office, attempting to schedule a "procedure" for when my husband would be at home, since he had some upcoming business travel planned. I requested that they see me for a repeat ultrasound that day, instead of waiting until Monday, so that the doctor could explain my various options to me and I could make a decision. They agreed. I cried all the way there, expecting the worst, and feeling really slapped in the face by my loss.

When the dr., who I hadn't met before, but had agreed to see me instead of eating lunch, began the ultrasound, she said, "So you didn't see anything on Monday?" I said no, and began craning my neck to see the screen. As she turned it toward me, she said, "well, I see something now." I saw it, too--a baby with a heartbeat. I began to sob. Once I calmed down, we looked again, and she turned up the volume so I could hear the heartbeat. The heartrate was 128-134 and the baby's size was right for dates. Afterwards, she hugged me, as did the nurse I'd had so many phone conversations with over the past 2 weeks. I go this Friday Apr. 6 for one more ultrasound to confirm that the baby is growing, and then I will go to my regular doctor.

Not Pregnant Anymore

It's been a roller coaster ride of emotions. Last week I had another beta--1464 which was excellent. This week on Tuesday I saw OB endocrine specialists since my regular dr. discovered I had high blood sugar and was hypothyroid. The OB ordered an early u/s. I was so excited! I literally ran down the hall to the room. All we saw was an empty sac. I was informed that the pregnancy was not viable and I could wait to miscarry or schedule a d&c. I was devastated.

The next day I spoke with the reproductive endocrinologist I had been seeing, who said that they had my dates wrong on the ultrasound and that it was too early to see anything. She told me to come to their office next week for another ultrasound. She was shocked that they would recommend terminating to someone who was not even 6 weeks pregnant and without offering a followup ultrasound. Somewhat reassured, I calmed myself as much as possible.

However, last night when getting ready for bed, I discovered that I was bleeding. So I'm not pregnant any more. It was REALLY fun being pregnant for those 2 short weeks.

And why does today's headline have to read, "Baby Found Dead Was Alive at Birth." While I am longing for a baby, other people are throwing theirs away!