Wedding

Yesterday was the niece's wedding. She got married in a Seventh Day Adventist church by a Lutheran minister, with the SDA minister saying the opening prayer. She is Lutheran and he is SDA. It took us ALL day to get ready. We needed to leave by 2pm and I wanted an hour for myself to get ready, and of course I ended up with 25 minutes to shower, do hair and makeup and get dressed. I had bought a pair of black pantyhose, and even though I'd just filed my nails, my skin is kind of rough and I put a hole in them while putting them on. UGH! They were ultra sheer. Luckily I had another black pair in my dresser, even though I can't remember the last time I wore hose.

Here's how it went:

Get up
Eat breakfast
Put load in wash
Give T. a haircut
Nurse A.
Call MIL and ask if I. could spend the night
Bathe K. and T.
Pack I's backpack to spend night
Nurse A.
Look in basement for A's tights and K's belt
Put in another load of laundry
Nurse A.
Feed K. lunch
Put K. down for nap
Look in basement for A's tights and K's belt--find them this time
Nurse A.
Tell D, J and L. to eat lunch
Pack spare clothes and PJs and snacks for little ones
Nurse A.
Eat lunch
Tell D. to iron the boys' shirts
Tell D., J. and A. to eat lunch
Nurse A.
Give Daryl a haircut
Nurse A.
Get in shower
Blowdry hair
Curl T's hair and tell J. to pack some hair accessories--I"ll do hers in the car
Get dressed
Curl my hair
Put on most of makeup
Get mascara on lower edge of left eye
Attempt to wipe mascara off without smearing entire eye
Grab last minute items and run out door

Daryl had gone out in the morning to drive I. to Grandma's to get ready for wedding (2 hour roundtrip) because she was a flower girl in the wedding and had to be there very early to have her hair done (by my SIL because I am hair impaired). She was supposed to go there on Thurs. for the rehearsal and spend Thurs. and Fri. nights, helping decorate the hall on Friday, but got sick on Wed. with the flu. She was still feverish in the morning, but not as bad, and that flushed, glittery eyed look was actually quite beautiful with her white dress.

Daryl also had to stop at Kohl's and get D. some dress pants. D. was in a foul mood--spent the entire day complaining that: he has to share a room and his brother left the door open, making it impossible for him to sleep late because the rest of us are so loud (the chronically sleep deprived mother was able to work up a lot of sympathy); his dad planned to take him skiing for the remainder of the long weekend but he had homework to do and trombone to practice and why didn't anyone inform him of this; that he had to wear dress pants in the correct size, not baggy; and obsessively asking me over and over what time we were leaving for the wedding and how late we'd be staying at the reception.

A. had a fussy day. would not nap at all unless attached to my breast. The kids took turns holding her, and J. dressed her and K. for us. K. didn't actually sleep because I put him down much earlier than normal, and managed to stay awake for the 1 hour drive as well. I did my best with J's hair, which amounted to pulling back the front and twisting it a little and putting in a clip on top. That combined with putting on eyeshadow made me feel very motion sick, so I consider arriving at the church without barfing to be a success. A. wanted to nurse as soon as we got there, and so I went to the basement where there was a nice sitting area and nursed her on one side, then was summoned to my seat as the ceremony was about to begin.

I. was strikingly beautiful as the flower girl, and did a great job of walking slowly down the aisle and strewing rose petals. The bride was beautiful as well, if a little teary.

Unfortunately with no nap, K. felt he needed to nurse. He sat on my lap and scream "MIMI" which is his word for nursing. I was not about to nurse him in church, so we took a walk, ended up in the basement in the room the bridal party got dressed in, and found some snacks. We went back upstairs, sprinkled Pringles crumbs all around the vestibule, and I caught the tail end of the ceremony.

There was general milling about during the receiving line, and Daryl tried to convince the relatives that they should have one large group photo of everyone with his 95yo grandmother, who was there but would not be attending the reception. She was recently very ill and in general doesn't attend many events, so there won't be many of these opportunities, but no one seemed interested.

On our way to the reception, we drove through McD's and got kids a snack, since we knew the food wasn't going to be served immediately. Even D., who hates McD's since watching "Supersize Me", had some.

K. didn't eat any dinner, drank about 4 glasses of soda, and each place setting had a bag of candy, so he ate lots of candy. There were also mini bottles of bubbles in the bag, which of course were spilled on the floor by my kids, and quickly wiped up so no one would slip on them. Another high point was while I was in the bathroom with T., K. spilled a bottle of water on the polished floor and was playing in it. I saw this as we walked up and before I could tell someone to wipe it up, T. had slid in it and fallen, banging her mouth on a metal chair. Lots of crying, no blood.

This was a small town wedding, so many guests were Daryl's highschool classmates, so he was busy reminiscing rather than helping me with the kids. No booze or wine, only beer, to my dismay. 370 people attended, so the buffet took a LONG time. There were the traditional dances of mother-son, father-daughter, bride-groom and wedding party, throwing of bouquet and garter and putting garter on catcher of bouquet (all of the single people had to be dragged out on the dance floor for this activity, and most of them jumped AWAY from the garter and bouqet), and a dollar dance. Then the music switched to classic rock and got gradually louder. It was deafening by the time we left.

The kids help up well until about 9:30pm at which point we left. J. was torn, because she wanted to spend the night at Grandma's but didn't want to miss skiing. She hadn't packed any clothes, and her cousin, who was also staying at Grandma's (and lives out of state so they only see each other a few times a year) was bugging her to stay. After a few tears she decided to stay at Grandma's. Daryl had decided in view of the snowstorm that was forecast for today (and has arrived) that they would just ski locally for the day, rather than drive to Northern MI for the weekend, so she wasn't missing a big trip.

All in all, It was fun, if a lot of work, and I got some nice compliments on the family.

So Sad

A woman who lives in a trailer park near my sister did something so unfathomable several weeks ago that I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. She lives with her boyfriend and they have a 2 year old son. Each of them also has a child from a previous relationship. She became pregnant, and fearing that her boyfriend would be angry, she hid the pregnancy. Then she delivered a healthy 9 lb. baby boy at home in her bathroom. Her boyfriend kept banging on the door and asking what was the matter. She told him she had a bleeding ulcer and felt ill. She cut the umbilical cord, but did not clamp it, and wrapped the baby up in an old pair of sweatpants and put him under the bathroom sink. She told her boyfriend that she had vomited blood to explain the mess in the bathroom, and had him drive her to the hospital, stopping for a coke on the way. Once there, hospital personnel could tell that she had just given birth, which she denied several times. They called the police, who went to her home and another team to the hospital. She admitted the truth after a while. Her baby was found dead at her home. Smothering was the cause of death, either from the sweatpants or her hand. She faces a possible life sentence.

How could someone do that? Many states have laws making it unpunishable to hand your baby over to authorities like police, fire department or hospital, no questions asked. I'm not sure if Michigan does or not.

I also realize that she may have been a battered woman. It sounds like her boyfriend wasn't a very nice guy. He was angry when their 2 year old was conceived, and had stated that they couldn't afford any more children. He doesn't work; she supports the family as a waitress. He owns a car and she does not, but he refuses to drive her to work when he's angry at her. I haven't stood in her shoes. but it's hard to imagine any circumstances that would justify what she did.

I know we read about these incidents all the time, but this one seemed to hit so close to home. Perhaps because it happened not too far from where I grew up and very close to where my sister now lives.

Even more disturbing, a friend of mine commented that considering the number of times stories like this are reported, when the person is caught, there may be many more times it happens and the woman is not discovered. That never occurred to me, but I suppose it might be true.

I am praying for her beautiful baby, gone now forever

First Tooth!

Believe it or not, my baby, who will be 3 months old in 2 days, has cut her first tooth! She has been drooly for a few weeks, not excessive, but noticeable. Last night she slept terribly, had to have my nipple in her mouth the entire night, which didn't really work very well for me. Today she hasn't really been very smiley, and cried some in the car, but I wouldn't go so far as to call her fussy, just less happy than normal. She is such a good natured baby. She has chewed on her hands most franctically today and wanted to nurse nonstop, in a kind of "chewy" way that has left me with sore nipples. So I looked at her bottom gums, and there it is, a fine white line. All my kids have teethed early, especially the girls. She's not the first 3 monther. But still, I am sad--I love that toothless smile. Where is my little baby going? Glad I had her picture taken this week to preserve that toothless grin.

Spot

IMG_2132, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

A photo of the runaway.

Lucky Monday

Two good things happened Monday. The first was that our dog Spot ran away, which is bad, of course, but he was picked up by the animal control officers, rather than run over by a car, and we were able to spring him from jail for a mere $50.00. First I had to buy him a license, which was only $5. Then it was $25 boarding fee for the first day at the Humane Society and $20 for each subsequent day. He was there less than 24 hours, so I thought it would be only $25, but I was not in a position to argue that point. He had been gone overnight, leading to lots of tears on the part of J. Luckily, his appearance is very distinctive, white with brown speckles on his ears, a brown spot around one eye, which is blue and the other eye is brown, so it was easy for them to tell me over the phone that he was there. They are a 30 minute drive away so it turned into a lengthy errand. We were not subjected to any lectures from what we affectionately term "dog people" that work at the Humane Society, which was also good. Spot is a very cute and affectionate dog, which also worried me, that someone might just keep him. He had on a collar but no tags, just a box for the invisible fence, which works great when it is on but apparently there is a break in the wire. So I put his dog license tag on his collar and bought him a name tag for his collar with our phone number on it. I also had to buy a new leash--we own 2, but both are lost.

The second good thing was that the oven repairman came. We were having a problem with the oven. Whenever I turn it on, it wouldn't light right away, and when it did light, you could hear POOF! and the door would fly open a little due to accumulated gas. This seemed dangerous, and when the oven repairman visited 2 weeks ago, he said it was. He discovered the igniter was not putting out enough amps, and also noted that the oven was putting out a lot of soot. He said that the company had put out a soot kit to address this problem, and depending on the age of the oven (3.5 years) it might be warranteed. He called them and after a lot of talking, convinced them to warranty the repair. The soot kit contains a new igniter. Unfortunately the part was not in stock, so I had to wait 2 weeks, during which time he advised me not to use the oven as blowing the door off was a risk. When he returned he completed an expensive and extensive repair, and it cost me nothing! Now, if I can just get around to buying some oven cleaner, I'll be able to see in my oven window since it won't get covered with soot again.

I made a nice Valentine dinner, beef caesar salad with homemade croutons and homemade dressing, crusty bread dipped in olive oil, and chocolate cake truffle squares (Trader Joes) for dessert. I even bought the kids some sparkling grape juice (dubbed "kid wine" by my family). Unfortunately D. was not able to get home until 9pm, at which point I was exhausted, after rescuing the dog, having kids all home all day (it was an ice day) and making the nice dinner. I laid down with A. while he was eating his dinner, and put his valentine on his pillow. I was asleep when he came in the bedroom, but woke for a moment when he read it. 3 haikus about love, marriage and making love.

Valentine Haiku

In the homemade Valentine tradition, I made each of my children a Valentine containing a haiku composed by me:

Helpful and thoughtful

Lots of fun to converse with

I’m proud to know you

DILLON


Sensitive to others

Loving and affectionate

You make me feel good

JASMINE



Great sense of humor

Thoughtful and considerate

Fun to be around

LEVI



Always looks so great

Happy and independent

You light up my life

ISABEL



Always has a smile

Really loves her family

A very special person

TESSA ROSE



A lover of life

Busy learning and doing

A joy to behold

KEEGAN



Precious new daughter

So beautiful and happy

Here for me to love

ANYA


Cut out and pasted on a red doily, they were very pretty. I also made D. one, containing 3 haiku.

Traditions I Have Created

That would more appropriately read "foolishly created." One of those traditions is that store bought valentines are no good, and we need to make our own for them to be truly special. This year I didn't have any clever new ideas and no time to research any. J. found an idea online, and I. thought up her own idea. The kids' idea of a good valentine is one that contains candy. We went to the drugstore where they normally have a fairly good selection of craft supplies. The kids had been bugging me to go every day this week, but this was the first day we had time when everyone who wanted to go was available, and even now it was 6pm after religious education.

The outing started out on a sour note when I wouldn't allow T to bring her blankie in the store. The rule has been that it must stay in the car for several months, but lately she's been backsliding. We approached the door with T wailing loudly, so I instructed the others to go on in and I'd follow when she calmed down. She quieted down right away, but I got sidetracked by 75"% off Christmas decorations in the doorway (I bought a Santa cookie jar for $5.00). Now L. is complaining that he doesn't have an idea and that he has to go to the bathroom. The store doesn't have the pipe cleaners I. needs, or several items that J. needs.

K., who should have stayed home with D., who is too old in 7th grade to make valentines, had been mistakenly dressed and brought along by his siblings. I didn't have the heart to make him stay once he thought he was going, but had admonished J. that she must keep an eye on him in the store.

After several minutes in the store, T. finds herself so exhausted that she must drape herself over the top of the shopping cart, making it difficult to push. A. has begun to fuss and cry, and K. is busily deshelving as fast as he can.

I convince T. and I. that store bought valentines are OK, and we find some cute ones that aren't adorned with TV characters and contain suckers for $1.29 for a box of 22, which is all either of them need. This is WAY cheaper than we usually spend on craft supplies to create our own, and perfect for T., who would have needed a lot of assistance to create something and then sign her name on it. Just signing her name should keep her busy till Monday.

After L. uses the bathroom, we decide that we will recycle an old idea, which is to create small airplanes using a Smartie as the body, gum as the wings and lifesavers as wheels, with a rubberband holding it all together. You can write your name on the gum wrapper.

I approached the counter to pay. Everyone had been begging for candy, and I allowed them to get a box of Tictacs, generous woman that I am. Unfortunately they were too strong for T., who cried loudly that they were "too minty." I. magnanimously held out her hand for T. to spit in. The clerk looked revolted at this display, and pointed us to a garbage can. Unfortunately the store is designed so there is a bottleneck at the door, and we were now preventing people who'd paid in the rear from exiting, as well as holding up a line of people waiting to pay at this register. A. was now wailing loudly, and J. had disappeared.

I struggle out the door, another customer holding it open for me, only to find J., my primary helper and the one who most wanted to go to the store, standing outside because she was embarrassed by the mint spitting episode. Several customers had pushed past us in the meantime, muttering "Ex CUUSE me!" loudly.

I was mortified. They usually are so well behaved. L. and I. were embarrassed also. Then we came home, ate frozen mini pizzas for dinner at 7pm. Then they began eating "making valentines" which really meant eating some candy and making a big mess. Luckily they have a few more days to complete the project, since I made them clean up an go to bed.

Envious?

My sister just called to tell me her dh came home the other day and told her he thinks they should have another baby. She feels DONE. They have 4 and her last pregnancy was very difficult physicallly and emotionally--nothing serious, just didn't feel good and was miserable because of it. The day before they gave away all of their baby gear.

How I would LOVE to hear my dh say that! When I asked him to consider having #7, I promised I wouldn't ask again, and already I feel that will be a difficult promise to keep. I am not sure what he'd say if I did. There are so few people that feel as I do--I tire of being such an anomaly. I wish I didn't want any more children and could be satisfied with what an amazing family I've got. But I'll always wish for another.

Did God send me this desire? I have prayed for it to end, but it hasn't!

Kindergarten Info Night

A total waste of my time, but I attended anyway. Lots of first timers asking silly questions. Got my 2 big questions answered: Will she be morning or afternoon kindergarten? (Depends on where you live). Afternoon (like her sibs). Ugh! By the time I get organized and out the door in the morning it's almost time for her to be at school, and once she is gone, it is almost nap time, and after that , the older kids are returning from school.

Question #2: Are they offering all day alternate day kindergarten next year? NO. Bummer. I loved that for the above reason. With all day alternate day, I had all day free without any time restraints on both the days she went to school and the days she didn't. They will have AM and PM kindergarten, or all day every day where the afternoon is actually day care, but with the same teacher, and you have to pay $3600 a year for it.

Sweaty Relapse

Tuesday I felt great, and was even thinking to myself that I probably wouldn't need to use the inhaler for the full 2 weeks the doctor prescribed. Wednesday I awoke feeling tired and was having a lot more truble breathing. By midday I had the bodyaches and was feeling real,ly bad. Worried that the previous week's illness had morphed into bronchitis or something else serious, I made a doctor appointment for that afternoon.

You can imagine how thrilled I was when the nurse entered the examining room sporting a cough as bad as mine, and proceeded to cough violently several times while taking my vitals. She did turn away from me, but still, especially considering the fact that I had baby A. with me, I cringed. Next entered the doctor, wearing a mask over her face! She said, "Normally I'd shake your hand, but I'm coming down with something and am trying not to spread it." I appreciate her concern, but I'd rather not have seen either of those medical professionals. She concluded that I must have caught a new bug. She did give me a prescription for an antiobiotic, in case I got worse over the next few days.

I stopped at the mill on the way home for rabbit food. By now I had the chills and climbing in and out of our tall van and lifting A's seat in and out seemed almost impossible. I filled a bag with bulk rabbit food, and was confused by the fact that it only held 5 pounds, when they usually hold 10, yet looked like the same type of bag they always have. So I asked the clerk if they'd gotten new bags, and she said yes. She said if I wanted more rabbit food I could get 2 bags full. I told her that I was truthfully too tired to carry 2. She said she'd carry it for me (which they always do at the mill) and I started to tear up! That just sometimes happens to me when I feel really bad and someone is nice to me. I told her I wasn't feeling well, and she said she could tell that when I walked in. Then she told me the best deal was a 25 pound bag instead of bulk and I said I'd take that, and she carried it to my car. I fought back the tears but could tell she was looking at me curiously.

I shivered all through the night, and by morning had a fever (which I hadn't had the day before, even though I had the chills, and was wearing my long johns under my clothes and cranked the heat up). D. left for work as usual, just pausing to wake me up. I called him to discuss the possibility of him coming home and he said "Are you totally unable to function?" (Is it a sin to with an illness upon your husband?) I called my babysitter, who came and took K. to her house. L. was home sick anyway and T. was thrilled to sit and watch endless TV with him. By late that afternoon I was still feverish, but Tylenol was now working on the fever, so while properly drugged I felt OK, albeit rather sweaty. The chills returned when the drugs wore off. D. returned home from work to find me upstairs in the rec room, working on the bills, holding a baby and surrounded by other kids playing a loud game involving pillows and stuffed animals. Working on the bills often makes me sweat anyway, so it seemed like an appropriate way to spend the time.

Concert

Monday night we attended the Eric Bibb concert that I'd given D. tickets to as a birthday gift. My parents babysat and the kids had a good time with them.

The show was excellent--it's so much fun to see live music, to feel that connection with the artist. This concert was at the Ark in Ann Arbor, a small intimate venue where even the last row are good seats. A. was very good, until she began cooing along with one song, actually in pitch and rythmically. D. thougt this would bother others around us, although it was adorable, so I took her and stood in the back. At the intermission we moved to the back row so she wouldn't bother anyone. The woman we had been sitting next to told me she thought the cooing was cute, too. Men!

Shower

Sunday I felt about 50% better, and since the shower had been postponed due to the weather on Saturday, I was able to go on Sunday. Roads were plowed but still a little slow going, and I'd slept late because I was tired, so I showed up about 30 minutes late.

It was just one of those times when I felt really out of place. I parent a lot differently than this crowd and we live a lot differently. Some examples of things we do that none of them do: unmedicated childbirth, breastfeeding, stay-at-home mom, eating healthy (try to avoid processed foods, fast food, tons of soda and other sugar, etc.), no TV in our family room and not watching it much, college education.

The bride-to-be is 20, went to a one year certificate program at the local community college, and will be living very near the small town she grew up in. Her fiance, who is a contractor, has already found them a house (a spec house that he built that hasn't sold and the owner is willing to sell it back to him with good terms). She is already talking about the type of furniture she wants, which the older women have pointed out is just like her mother's, because that's all she knows. Her entire life seems preordained, and I think it's a shame that she won't be having any adventures or experiencing anything of life other than the way she grew up.

Most of the gifts she received at this shower were tupperware, a laundry basket full of cleaning supplies, and other storage containers. At a previous shower I was told she received mostly linens. No unique gifts or pretty things.

Another Snow Boy

IMG_2310, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

L. decided to come in, too.

Done!

IMG_2307, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

K. was happy to come in and get undressed, red nose and all.

A Little Help from My Brother

IMG_2304, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

K. gets some needed assistance from L. in the deep snow.

How Deep Is This Stuff?

IMG_2303, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

We had another major snowfall today.

Sweet Smile

Sweet Smile, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

As you can see from those chubby cheeks, she loves nursing!

Laughing!

Laughing!, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I'm a happy girl!

2 Months Old!

2 Months Old!, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I can't believe how fast it's flown by. She loves to coo and goo at us--I think she'll be quite a talker some day! If I'm holding her but paying attention to something else, (like the computer?) she will start "talking" to get my attention.

Gradually Sicker

Last week the kids had a plague virus--high fever for 4-5 days and a very goopy nose. I was pleased not to get it. This week I have been getting very gradually sicker each day, an unusual onset of illness. By Wed. I was feeling pretty yucky in the morning, but had arranged a friend to babysit K while I went shopping for a shower gift at Kohl's and then to Old Navy to try on clothes for myself. It was snowing hard in the morning and traffic was terrible. D. called and advised me to stay home, or to just go to the very nice gift shop in town and get her a unique gift, rather than something from her registry (which I prefer anyway). I took this advice, and had a restful morning at home with only my baby. Around 11am I started to feel better, then ran into town and purchased a pretty vase made of amber bottle glass with bubbles in it. I also ordered a hand painted tile with a picture of a bride and groom painted on it to be personalized with their names and wedding date. I was VERY pleased with myself for finding a unique and special wedding gift AND killing 2 birds with one stone.

I then ran to the post office and mailed back some of the clothes I have been ordering myself. I need an outfit to wear to the wedding that I can nurse in and is flattering (haven't found one yet, and will probably wear something I already own that I've worn a million times but looks nice and is free). I have a bad habit of ordering many more clothes than I intend to keep, trying them on in the comfort of my home and sending most or all back. I will only keep something if I REALLY like it or it was REALLY cheap. I justify this by saying that the cost of shipping is about equal to the cost of hiring a babysitter so that I can go to the store and try on clothes, not to mention the energy saved--literal energy in gasoline and my personal energy schlepping around in the snow with a baby.

I felt good enough that evening to go to my book club and out to dinner with a friend. We discussed Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse 5" which I didn't read but went anyway.

Thursday morning I felt yucky again. My sister came to visit, stayed into the late afternoon so I couldn't nap. I never felt any better, and worse by bedtime. During the night I felt feverish and I could tell I was wheezing.

Saw my doctor today for my postpartum checkup (good as new! lol) and as she is a family practicioner she also listened to my chest and prescribed a steroid inhaler. She also commented that I probably have mild asthma which is why I wheeze when I get a respiratory illness. I was diagnosed with asthma in highschool, when I had pneumonia or bronchitis several times a year, but haven't had any problems for 20 years, until Fall 2003 when I had a bad bout of bronchitis. I don't want to continue to have this problem!

I was supposed to head to my MIL's (one hour drive away) this afternoon with my 4 daughters to spend the night and help decorate for dh's niece's bridal shower, which is tomorrow, and which I am a co-hostess of, along with 3 SILs and one aunt on the other side of her family. We agreed to each bring a dish or 2 for an appetizer/dessert theme. I made my dessert yesterday, tiny mini-cheesecakes using a mini vanilla wafer as the crust and baked in mini muffin pans. Very easy and very yummy. I also bought veggies and ranch dip to cut up.

By the time I got home from the dr. and pharmacy in the BITTER cold, I felt awful, so I decided to stay home. D. said he could take the 3 older girls (A. stays with me, of course) to MIL's to help and deliver my food contributiions (he forgot the gift). He decided to stop and see a friend, however, so I am stll waiting for him to return with food and videos. The older boys are getting impatient and somehow it seems that it would have been easier to go than to get stuck watching the BUSY 19 month old--not very restful. I am trying hard not to be irritated (it is now 8:30pm and he's been gone since 4pm) but not succeeding! He is never very helpful when I'm sick. If the tables were turned, he'd be whining up a storm that I wasn't back yet.

If I feel good enough tomorrow I will go to the shower.

Sunday a nice older couple with a nervous/neurotic Great Dane are coming to see Heidi! They are interested in adopting her.

Heidi update

Upon returning home from renting a steam cleaner for the 2nd time, I discovered that she had barfed a sock up on the wood floor, an entire sock unchewed and undigested. I called the vet to see if it was OK to give her some stomach medication I had on hand. She said yes, and that some dogs just do that (eat socks). She seemed to find it humorous.

The next day she pooped on the wood floor downstairs during the day (baby gate was shut blocking her way to the upstairs playroom she prefers), while I was in the other room changing a diaper. It wasn't diarrhea and she didn't attempt to get me to let her out. Since then we have tried to keep her outdoors all day, and made her sleep in the basement at night.

Today she was outside all day except for 2 occasions. The first time she got in when someone came to the door, and I let her stay in, and she was in the same room as me, but soon it began to stink really badly. Presumably she was passing gas, and I put her back out. Later she got in again, was in for about an hour, during which time I watched her closely. Then I forgot, and during the time it took to heat and eat a bowl of leftoever pesto pasta, she went upstairs again to the same room (she always does it in one room) and diarrhead all over. I smelled it immediately and ran upstairs, hoping it was just more farts. After putting her out I discovered the mess. This time I called the professional carpet cleaners, since after the 2nd steam cleaning the smell didn't totally disappear, so I thought it needed a better quality cleaning.


Total so far:

2 steam cleaner rentals: $32
1 professional cleaning and deodorizing: $85
Time and energy spent: priceless

The Culprit--Now Available For Adoption

Yesterday when I returned home from renting the steam cleaner, I discovered that she had vomited in my absence. Apparently she had eaten a sock. At least it was on the wood floor and easy to clean up. My sister, who at one time showed an interest in adopting her, but has since acquired a 2nd dog and feels that 2 is enough, had provided me with some information about the Michigan German Shepherd Rescue organization. They help refer dogs to potential new owners. So I contacted them yesterday.

If she were to live in a controlled environment, where she was an indoor dog who went on walks and didn't have the opportunity to eat nonfood items, the problem would be under control. If she were indoors all the time, she also wouldn't feel the need to scratch the doors.

Her name is Heidi, she is 7 years old, and available for adoption in SE Michigan.

Still Awesome

Even though I've done it 7 times now, I am still humbled by the miracle of life. Here in my arms is this amazing newborn, a complete and perfect person, who began as a speck, a single cell afloat in my body. There, with a lot of help from God, the ultimate Creator, I grew that cell into a human being. I watched her emerge, pushed out by me, and yet it is still hard to believe, when I look at her, that she came entirely from my body, every ounce of her (except the DNA contributed by her father, of course!) Matter created from nothing it seems, although the reality is that I turned food into a living being. And now, for this brief and wonderful time, she continues to be entirely grown and nurtured by me, by energy from my body in the form of breastmilk.

I am so blessed and thrilled to have her, the ultimate gift from God. A new baby is a miracle that never loses it's magic, it's newness, no matter how many times you watch it happen.

Dogs!!

One of our dogs has a weak stomach, and every few months has an episode of diarrhea on the upstairs carpet. She also has a number of neuroses and behavior problems. Last time it happened I came unglued and wanted to take her to the shelter. Dh said that was rash, and we agreed to seek another home for her (she is 7, a long haired German Shepherd, sweet temperament, arthritis in her hips). We got her when she was 1 year old from the Phoenix Eye Dog Foundation. Her fears had made her unsuitable for a seeing eye dog, although they had spent 4 months training her in the hopes she would overcome them.

So it happened again Saturday night, and we made the kids clean it up since they have promised to take responsibility if we don't get rid of her. Then dh rented a steam cleaner and cleaned it up. The kids just told me she did it AGAIN last night. I just don't feel I can face it. Ugh!

She can't live outdoors because she is afraid of thunder, loud noises, etc. and prefers to be indoors so she claws the doors up trying to get in, doing a lot of damage. We could get a doghouse and chain her up, but that is no life for her.

I hate her and this situation.

Snow Days and Sick Kids

We have now had 4 snow days, 2 last week and 2 the week before. I was wrong, however, and we get 5 before going extra days in June, so one more to spare. Last Wednesdays snow day it was warm, rainy and foggy late in the day. We assumed that there would be school, so big kids were out waiting for the bus. We were the only district in our county without school. The superintendent fielded a lot of complaints about this, but apparently the back roads were still icy from the snow that fell the day before. They are putting our children's safety first, which I applaud, and it doesn't really inconvenience me, but it was still hard to believe we had no school that day when snow was all gone and (most) roads were clear!

This weekend I have been trying to pull together dressup clothes for the kids for a family wedding in February. I. is the flower girl, so Grandma is sewing her dress, and L. still fits into his First Communion shirt and pants and tie. I bought J. a cute dress on ebay and will buy one for T. today.

D. has grown another 2 inches since September, and is now about 5'8", an inch taller than me at age 12! He needs a sport coat, pants and a shirt, but can wear Daryl's dress shoes. A. can probably wear a red velvet Hanna Anderson dress I splurged on when I. was 3 months old to wear to a family wedding. K. can also wear hand-me-down clothes that L. wore to that wedding--cords and a button down shirt.

Last Thursday K. came down with a fever and a major goopy nose, is still sick now, and T. got it yesterday. I hope that A. doesn't get it!

Snow Day

Had one today, even though there wasn't too much snow. May have another one tomorrow, expecting a lot more snow and possible sleet/freezing rain during the night. Kids are excited, but they only get 2 and then it's extra days in June, and I guarantee they won't be excited then! I love having them home, made me wish I homeschooled.

I was able to take down the remaining Christmas decorations and made a triple batch of Kathy's banana bread.

Sick Baby

We went to bed on Sunday night and A. seemed fine. She had a cold and low grade fever earlier in the week, and I'd taken her to the doctor, but she seemed to have recovered. She woke at 3am as usual. I'd heard her snuffling in her sleep, but once she was awake she began coughing, the barking croup cough. I have had a child with croup before, but not that came on so dramatically in the middle of the night, and not a 6 week old infant.

After each round of coughing, she would pause breathing and then take a big gasping breath. In between coughs she seemed OK, but would start coughing again if not held in a vertical position or if she cried at all. She was able to nurse, held at an angle, and her nose was clear, nothing to suction. I observed her chest for signs of labored breathing known as Stridor, and thought I saw one or two of those type of breaths, but wasn't sure. She was coughing, crying and wiggling, making it hard to tell.

I called my doctor's office and spoke to the nurse on call. She told me to take her to the emergency room to be assessed if I had any doubts or if I even thought I saw the indrawing breathing known as Stridor. I wanted D to come with me but that would mean leaving the kids alone and he was against it. I was afraid that she might have a big coughing fit in the car and stop breathing and I'd need to get her out of her carseat. Also, when frazzled my driving skills plummet. But I went alone at 4am. It is a 15 minute drive and she cried and coughed once but then went to sleep. The ER was dead, so we were seen immediately. Of course, her symptoms had now completely ceased. I almost wished she'd cry to elicit a cough. She only coughed once the entire time, and the doctor wasn't in the room. He was very nice, and said that this was very typical, that croup symptoms subside after the person has been awake for an hour, and that taking her out in the cold air may have helped contribute to her improvement. He gave her a dose of a steroid medication, mixed with apple juice that I fed to her with an eyedropper. This is a new protocol for croup--a single dose of steroid. It has been found to lessen the severity of coughing spells and the duration of the illness.

I arrived home at 6:30am and went back to bed for an hour. The next day was OK. A. slept most of the day, and I took her to the pediatrician. They gave me guidelines for when to take her in the steamy bathroom followed by a walk in the cold outdoors, when to visit the ER, and when to call 911. The next night her breathing was OK, no coughing spells, but she was awake half the night. After 2 nights of 4 hours sleep each, I was now feeling a bit fried, and hung out in pajama clothes/sweats all day. Thankfully the next night she slept much better. She is still coughing today--not improved or worsened. Praying it doesn't happen again. It is hard not to panic with a baby so small.

Happy New Year!!

I'm not making any resolutions, except to continue to try and be the best person--mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend--that I can be.

New Year's Eve was very low key. Made everyone get up early and clean and take down the Christmas tree, refusing them breakfast until it was done. Then we went out to breakfast. Spent the rest of the day waiting for old, dear friends to arrive from Kansas City, enroute to Connecticut where they were moving to that weekend!, They finally showed up at 7pm. Then we had burgers for dinner, and just hung out and visited until midnight. I was ready to drop before the ball did! LOL They were exhausted too, so once we settled our total of 12 children in bed, we went right to sleep.

We had a great time the rest of the visit. Lots of good food, a long walk, some geocaching, lots of fireworks set off by the preteen and teen boys, and a fabulous dinner out--just adults and A! We asked D and A if they would be A's godparents, and they said yes, so will plan a baptism in Connecticut this summer when we vacation out east and visit them.

We were sad when they left Sunday afternoon after mass.

Becoming a Sideshow

Last week we were invited to a party which occurred last night. When the woman invited D., she said the kids were welcome also, and then said, "Since we aren't having too many people, we could invite you." D. said, "Don't worry, we'll leave the kids in the car." She was oblivious to having insulted us, but her husband looked mortified at that point.

But we went anyway, and once we got there it was apparent that many of the other guests had been told about our family and our big Sprinter van, since we fielded many questions and comments from people, none of whom we knew. D. said we were the "zoo animals." LOL

We have never been the "poster children" for large families before. Thankfully, our children behaved perfectly, including the 18 month old and the 6 week old. We stayed till 10pm without a single whine or tear.

Actually, we have received many compliments this holiday season from people we socialized with on what nice children we have and how well behaved they are. I am both proud and grateful for this.

Our First Cache

We went geocaching for the first time yesterday. It was at a park very close to home. Geocaching in the winter seemed like a good idea if the weather was warm, which it was, but there was still a lot of snow on the ground, making it extremely challenging.

We found it! It was a microcache, in a film cannister.

We would not have found it without the clue, however, and had to call home to ask D. to look up the clue for us. We need to learn more about using the GPS for the future.

The 3 Days of Christmas

Now that it's over I'm feeling in much more of a holiday spirit. LOL

Christmas Eve was spent at my parents with my sister and her family. Everyone was in a relaxed mood, (notable for my family) and we had a nice time. We atea midday meal -- the traditional kielbasa dinner--and exchanged gifts. When we arrived home we had a small prayer service--we read the bible readings for Christmas Eve and each of us said a prayer while lighting a candle. We did this in lieu of attending mass. At our church you need to arrive at least an hour early to get a seat at any of the Christmas services, and with bitter cold weather, a newborn and a very active toddler we decided not to do that, and had our own servide instead. It was very nice. Then we made a fire and had cheese, crackers and fruit in front of it, another family tradition. The kids were bed by 10pm and we commenced wrapping. I wasn't able to do too much since A. wanted to nurse the entire time, but we still finished and were in bed by midnight. D scared me when he let out a LOUD HOHOHO in the hall in case anyone was listening.

On Christmas day we woke to the sound of the kids in the kitchen (around 7:30am) making coffee for us. The family rule is that they can't get up until it it light out, thankfully fairly late in (8am) our neck of the woods. We got up, and I made banana bread real quickly, which was baking while the kids unwrapped gifts. It was our most extravagant year ever, and the kids enjoyed what they received, which included an electronic keyboard and a GPS unit so we can begin geocaching.

Around 11am D and I both began to get headaches, and we soon discovered that the kids had inadvertently made us decaf coffee! LOL So we had to make more and start over.

We had a beef rib roast, garlic mashed potatoes and a caesar salad for dinner, followed by D's "famous" (famous because he told me he made a great apple pie for the first 15 years of our marriage but never made one until then--2 years ago) homemade apple pie for dessert, and then we watched "A Christmas Story".

On Dec. 26 we had Christmas with D's family, and we stayed fairly late, arriving home at 10:30pm.

We have done a lot of socializing these holidays. On Tuesday we had old friends (a family of 4) come and spend the night, and Wednesday evening another friend came for dinner. Thursday we were invited to a party.

Is it over yet?

That sums up my feelings about this Christmas season!!

Saturday was Ds bday, and it was also his extended family's Christmas celebration. It took all morning to get us ready and out the door on time, and we didn't get home until around 7pm, so not much of a birthday celebration happened. I had hoped to get a birthday cake to take as our dish to pass, but ran out of time. D went to the store to get some appetizers as our dish to pass and I had called the local bakery, which had some cakes available, so I told him to go there instead and get himself a cake, which he didn't. I don't blame him, I wouldn't have either. Luckily someone brought a cake for dessert and the hosts had candles, so we sang to him there.

I gave him a pair of concert tickets to a blues artist, Eric Bibb, that he really likes, and I have already arranged babysitting and confirmed that they will allow me to bring an infant. I also gave him a book and a magazine subscription. None of this seemed to excite him.

Today, the kids are done with school, and although we have snow, it is too cold to force them to go outside. D is out of town until tomorrow night, Young D is ill with a stomach bug that the rest of us are sure to get, and the grandparents that promised to help have backed out because THEY are too busy. LOL Actually, my dear MIL is coming tomorrow to visit and we are taking the kids to the movies and dinner. She was supposed to come tonight and have dinner and spend the night and tomorrow.

Last night my parents made a brief appearance to drop off D's birthday gift. I had previously asked them to stay for dinner to help me out, but they said they were too busy. After they had been there about 30 minutes, D had to leave for the airport and they were ready to go home (they live about an hour away, and staying less time than it takes to drive somewhere is something I never really understand). I desperately needed groceries and didn't want to take A out in the frigid weather, and don't trust the older siblings to watch her for very long yet, so I asked my parents to stay while I ran to the store, telling them it would take me about 30 minutes. I didn't get out of the house right away, because I had to put K down for his nap before I left, and then it took me about 45 minutes to spend $252, so it was a little over an hour before they left. My dad was so impatient and visibly irritated with me when I returned--it made me feel bad. Also, my 7yo dd told me that he had been pacing and looking out the window and saying "She's not here yet!" My parents often offer to help but are rarely actually available, unless it is really urgent, like I am about to give birth!

So we are spending the day making as big of a mess as possible, an activity which masquerades as making cookies and paper snowflakes. And listening to Raffi's Christmas music over and over as loud as I can stand. I am feeling better than last week but still somewhat scroogelike.

The Clan: Christmas Card 2004

IMG_2230, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here we are in all our glory: D, L, T, I, J holding K, Paula holding A, and Daryl

Birth Announcement

IMG_2217, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is the photo I used for her birth announcement, which I picked up today, and plan to enclose in the Christmas cards.

Holiday Events and Irritations

It's been a busy few weeks. I (foolishly or kindly, depending on what your perspective is) agreed to let D. invite his students/coworkers over last weekend for a holiday party. Kind of a lot considering we had a 3 week old baby. I hired someone to clean, and we did potluck. We bought some meat to grill and 2 already prepared side dishes. D. did the shopping and most of the cleanup.

We put our tree up, and deviated from tradition by not cutting out own, but buying one from a lot. I stayed home with A. as it was raining (and I was dying for a few minutes alone--it didn't take them nearly long enough! lol). D. said they scared away the nice men from the Lions Club who approached them as they were getting out of the van. He had 2 crying children (one thought she was being accidentally left in the van), 2 pouting children (they were mad that we weren't cutting our own tree), and 1 child complaining loudly "These trees are PUNY!" Only the oldest, D., was behaving normally. I had no idea we'd created such strong traditions. The next morning D helped them put the lights on, and then we put ornaments on. Normally I unwrap, put hooks on and hand out ornaments, but I was nursing A., so I told them to go ahead. The idea that we were doing it differently was not well received, and neither was the fact that D. left for the store at that point to go buy party supplies. He doesn't normally help with ornaments anyway, but he is usually on the premises. Once A. was done eating, I handed out ornaments as always.

The party went well--delicious food (we asked people to bring ethnic or holiday favorites) the house looked festive and our kids were really well behaved.

I ended up with a sore spot/plugged duct after the party anyway, even though I was still taking antibiotics from the previous bout of mastitis, but at least it didn't progress into full blown mastitis again.

Midweek D invited an out of town colleague to dinner at our house. I made a nice pasta and we had a good time. He is a nice man that enjoys our kids. His children are grown and his wife had early onset Alzheimer's and is now in an advanced stage of the illness, totally noncommunicative and requiring constant care, living in a nursing home, so I think it's nice for him to spend some time with a family.

Yesterday I spent most of the day ordering last minute gifts, shopping for teacher presents and taking J shopping for her friends. Last night was my book club meeting. I left at 7pm with 2 simple requests: Please have one of the kids sprinkle sidewalk salt on the path to the car since it hasn't been shoveled and is slippery (it is a small slope) and I will be carrying a baby and please bring in the 3 packages that arrived so that the dogs don't chew them up. I also instructed L to take out a garbage bag from the diaper pail and I was supposed to be completing her dinner chore of loading the dishwasher (she'd already been asked about 5 times).

When I arrived home several hours later this is the scene that greeted me: Darkness (although I always turn the lights on for D he never remembers to turn them on for me), the path is not salted or shoveled, the packages are still on the porch, the garbage bag of diapers is still in the house but has been ripped up by our 2 dogs and dirty ripped open half eaten diapers are all over the carpet, dishes aren't done.

I was very upset. Apparently D went to bed before the older kids and the dogs did the damage after he went to bed. The older kids put the dogs outside but didn't clean up the mess. I couldn't clean the mess because A was very fussy and needed to lay down and nurse to sleep. When I awoke this morning, although D and J and young D had been up for 45 minutes and eaten breakfast in the room with the mess, they hadn't cleaned it. Since J had missed the bus (2nd day in a row) and was waiting for D to shower and take her to school on his way to work, I made her clean it up. I woke up L and I to help her and to give I time to finish the dishes. When K awoke this morning I discovered he'd been put to bed with marker all over his hands, feet and face, not washed off. He'd also made some marks on the wood floor.

Are you picking up on my feeling that I do a lot for others but get nothing in return? Spent most of today feeling sorry for myself. Tomorrow is D's extended family holiday gathering. We are supposed to bring a dish to pass so I told him to think of something, buy it and cook it or get a bag of chips, but I'm not doing it. I don't even really feel like going--I'll probably end up with mastitis again.

Mastitis

I am always very prone to plugged milk ducts and mastitis in the first 2 months of a new baby's life, and this time is unfortunately no exception. Early last week I had a sore spot on the left breast, but it wasn't too bad and cleared right up with heat and frequent nursing. But Saturday night was a different story. I got a sore spot on the right breast--really the whole underside, and it was excruciating, and by bedtime I felt feverish and achy. It got worse during the night, and I slept terribly as a result. Luckily I was able to convince the doctor to prescribe antibiotics over the phone. It is slowly getting better. I just felt very tired and run down today. Possible causes are: overdoing it (taking kids Christmas shopping, doing a lot of walking), using sling and having it press on breast (I didn't think it was, but it could have been), and the fact that I couldn't get A to nurse very well on that side before we left, and then she slept through most of the shopping, and when I next nursed her I offered the other side. It really is irritating, whatever the cause. As a La Leche League Leader I know a lot about this, but still can't prevent it for myself.

The Mouse Died...

in one of our couch cushions!! EWWWW!

Saturday morning I smelled a familiar bad smell upstairs in the rec room. By Sat. afternoon the odor was overpowering, and I informed D that it needed to be found and dealt with. He went up there and began hunting, and narrowed it to a section of our leather sectional couch, but wasn't sure where in the section it was. He wanted me to help him by smelling the couch and telling him where the smell was the strongest, but I declined. I found the last dead rodent (inside a hand puppet in the toy box) while in the throes of morning sickness, so I felt justified in making him take a turn at this fun game alone. He did find it and disposed of it. The smell lingered for hours, even with the window open.

What's funny is, J's friend K spent the night Friday, and not only was there no odor in that room then, but the dead mouse was in the section of couch she slept on right near where her head was!! Maybe she killed it by laying on it?

In past years we have had many mice, but none this year except this one. I purchased these electronic devices that emit a high pitched sound that is supposed to drive away both mice and spiders. The spiders seem impervious, but considering that in previous years we killed about a dozen mice in Oct./Nov. (when it got cold and they entered the house), the devices seem to work.

A Bad Mother Shows Her Christmas Spirit

On Friday one daughter had a friend over afterschool. When the others arrived home, they wanted friends over too. It was now almost 5pm and I didn't feel up for it, so I said no. This resulted in a lot of grumbling and dissatisfaction. So I told them we could get out a box of Christmas decorations, which appeased them. FIrst I went to the school to pick up D from basketball practice, forgetting that another mother was picking him up and taking him with her son to a trombone lesson to practice a duet for solo and ensemble festival. Not only did I look silly, but I'd also forgotten to send money with him to pay for the lesson, and of course my checkbook was at home. I rushed home, called the trombone teacher and arranged to mail him a check.

Then I got out 2 Christmas boxes. This immediately hypes the kids up. I had asked them to empty the book cabinet before we got started, where books are stashed until no more will fit and they pour out onto the floor when you open the door, but they didn't do it. Soon there was Christmas music playing loudly and stuff all over the floor, not being put up. The kids were reading Christmas books that were in the box, crumpled newspaper is strewn everywhere (used to wrap fragile items). When I'd had enough, I insisted they stop what they were doing, put away the book cabinet books and help me clean up the mess, putting empty Christmas boxes back in basement. I, who is 7 and alternately goes by the title "The Princess" or "Miss Entitled," totally ignored me. I came over and took the book from her hand and began telling her what to do. At this point she shrieked in my face that she'd do it when she was finished with her book. And then I snapped, yelling back "No Christmas for you, then!" She got upset, as did her 4yo sister who asked "Are we really not going to have Christmas?" I reassured her, and apologized to I, but felt like Scrooge.

My only defense is that I have a 2 week old baby, and D was not yet home with the pizza he was supposed to pick up, so I was hungry and tired as well.

The Princess has Arrived!!

Aren't I Sweet?, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Beautiful Babe

Beautiful Babe, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Paula and A

Paula and A, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

4 Days Old

4 Days Old, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Mom and Babe

Mom and Babe, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

The Princess has Arrived!! (birth story)

She was born at 11:16am on Friday, Nov. 19, 2004, weighing in at 9lbs. 11oz., our smallest!

Had about one contraction per hour, but hard, all night long on Thursday, in fact even woke D at midnight to say "this is it" but when it didn't pick up after an hour, went back to bed. So I would just go back to sleep after each one. Got up at 6am, still felt very tired, went back to bed and water broke with one really hard contraction aided by a kick at 6:30am.

Got to hospital at 7am, and nothing was really happening! Contrax had more or less stopped altogether. By the time they did a monitor strip, checked baby's position with ultrasound, rechecked it because inept resident couldn't tell if that was a head or not (more on her later), checked my cervix (4-5 centimeters, stretchy but baby was way high) and got the IV antibiotics in, and moved me to my own room, it was about 9:15am and contrax had just gotten going with a bang, about 5 minutes apart and much more intense. Around 10am the resident checked again, now I was 6-7 and baby had come down to +3 station.

I began debating an epidural at this point, and spent a while discussing that with the anesthesia nurse, D and the resident. I wanted it but was afraid I couldn't keep still and that it would adversely affect the labor, delivery, baby, etc. D was trying hard to talk me out of it, even insisted they call my dr., who was already driving there.

By the time the anesthesiologist arrived, I was getting close to pushing, so we sent him away.

Then the resident attempts to check me again, concluding she "thinks" I'm complete, but can't really tell, so she has to go get a more senior resident to come and check. This resident, who would also be delivering if the dr. didn't get there in time, said I was 8-9.

After a few more minutes, I began to REALLY feel like pushing, and my dr. arrived, saying "Just give me a minute to get my scrubs on." Then she called the inept resident, who I thought she was going to allow to try to check me again and I said "She is NOT checking me again!" but dr. said she would check herself, but resident would assist with delivery. She wanted to have her hands free to put counterpressure against perineum and ease shoulders out if necessary, thinking this might be my biggest baby yet.

While they were dressing and getting stuff ready, I sat myself down on the bed, spread my legs and began pushing. Resident said, "We better hurry up, I see a head." Doctor ordered me to push more slowly so I wouldn't tear, saying, "I know you can shoot this baby across the room, but don't. Let her head be partway out to stretch you." The next push the head came the rest of the way out, and then they told me "OK now, give it all you got", and out came the rest of her body. I reached down and grabbed her, and they helped me get her on my chest. I thought I saw a penis, but then I asked (by now they'd thrown a blanket over her) and they told me to look for myself (D had already seen but wasn't saying!) and I saw she was a girl. I didn't have any tear or stitches, have a minor hemorrhoid, but feel great in general.

She has dark hair and looks like me, or like I did as a baby. The birth went exactly as I'd hoped, and I'm SO happy. I AM glad that I didn't have an epicural, even though I sure wanted it at the time! The only thing that didn't work out was that 3 of my kids wanted to be there, and they went to school, (I thought they should just stay at home but D didn't) and when my dad went to pick them up, he wasn't on the emergency list, so it took a long time to convince 3 different schools to release them, and they missed the delivery.

Human Pincushion

That's what I feel like--my nerves are very on edge. During the day I can be relaxed, but at dinner time I just start to lose it. Yesterday's arsenic hour featured:

Painter using shop vac very loudly
4yo and 7yo dds fighting, 4yo crying
7yo weeping hysterically at the thought of cleaning her rabbit's cage
Washing machine repairman showing up (supposed to be here between 1-3pm)
Lots of whimpering from the 1yo who was hungry, but I was struggling to make dinner with him hanging on me
Me trying to talk on phone to old friend who called from AZ


Dr. appt. update:

Dilated to 3-4 cm with bulging sack of waters
Biophysical profile done at hospital after nonreactive nonstress test in office--baby looks great
Induction which had been tentatively scheduled for tomorrow cancelled--hospital is swamped and I don't want to be induced
Dr. leaves to go out of town on Sat.

Lots of contrax, that hurt more than ever, but not real labor yet

My Favorite Room

Here is a not very flattering picture of me, with 2 of my cuties, T and K, taken by D who was sitting and looking up at us. This is the room we call the "quiet room." Behind me is my nursing chair. We just painted this room a week ago and we are just loving how it looks.

Belly Art

A friend came by yesterday with a henna kit, and made a design on my belly.

First is how it looked while henna paste was still on the belly:



and next is how it came out after it was done:




Hope it lasts till delivery, which better be soon!

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

No baby yet! And quit asking me! D cancelled a 1 day business trip to DC yesterday, at my request, just in case. That of course guaranteed that the baby didn't come yesterday! I did lose the mucus plug yesterday evening, so maybe today?

14 Toothbrushes

That is the number of extra toothbrushes (used, not new) that I threw away this week. How can a family of 8 have so many extra toothbrushes? The kids are each supposed to have 2 toothbrushes, one for regular use and a spare. For some peculiar reason, they are very reluctant to part with any old toothbrush, so any time they get a new one, and I say, "Throw out one of your old ones", they apparently don't. Then they promptly forget which brushes are theirs and so when they lose their regular toothbrush or leave at someone's house, and I say, "Use your spare," I am always told that they don't HAVE a spare, only the one, and now I need to buy them a new toothbrush. So now we are down to one toothbrush each, not counting a couple of electric ones they got as gifts. Everyone went to the dentist last week and got a new one, so they are all fresh.

Full Term Belly

This afternoon I was feeling strange: nauseous, crampy, some contractions, lots of fatigue. I'd spent the day doing laundry--lots of it! D came home and said "Paula's going to have a baby tonight." He said I had a certain look in my eyes. Nothing definite is going on, and I actually feel better than I did earlier.

Meanwhile, I did pack my bag, just in case!

Waiting is Driving Me Crazy!!!

Well, I'm to that point that most women who've had a baby will recognize--I can't stand the waiting and not knowing any more! Since being pregnant is all I think about, it's all I can write about at this point, too!

Last week my doctor offered to schedule an induction if I think I want one. She said that she would have to justify it but thinks she can due to previous large babies and previous gestational diabetes (I've had sugar in my urine the past 2 visits), but it needs to be requested at least a week in advance for non-emergency. I don't want to be induced, but it is tempting! I am going for an ultrasound next week to estimate the baby's size. Apparently any info,. no matter how inaccurate, is better than none. Did another nonstress test, this time with no toddler to mess it up, and it was fine.

We were disappointed by the election results. D is very worried--I think he is being melodramatic, although I do wish Kerry had won.

I've had some painting done--finish the foyer/staircase/hall area that D started and was never finished after we changed our minds about the trim color; finish the girls' room which was primed but never painted; and paint the parlor area we refer to as the "quiet room", which is theoretically an adult only area. I had that painted a warm peachy color with rich chocolaty brown trim, and it's beautiful. It was DIRTY flat white with cream trim.

Group B Strep

At my doctor's appointment last week I discovered that I tested positive for Group B Strep. Current medical practice is to prophylactically treat all women who test positive with IV antibiotics during labor. This means that they want you to get there ASAP, instead of waiting till the last minute, which was my plan. It also means that you need an IV, which was NOT in my plan. My doctor said I could have the IV just during the antibiotics, and then have them disconnect it and walk around with a heplock until it is time for the next dose. Another issue is that they want the baby to stay 36 hours after delivery for observation to be sure he/she isn't becoming ill, which I also hadn't planned to do.

According to my pediatrician, about 5% of infants of mothers with Group B Strep will become ill, but they become very ill with sepsis, a bodywide infection. My father-in-law died of sepsis (which he acquired due to the destruction of white blood cells and suppression of his immune system caused by chemotherapy) so I know it is serious. Despite the severity of the potential illness, the number of babies who become ill is so small that it seems like overkill to treat every woman who tests positive with antibiotics. I am concerned about the potential for yeast overgrowth if I take the antibiotics. Vaginal yeast infections, thrush in baby's mouth, yeast infection of my nipples, and yeast infection of baby's diaper area are all possibilities. Yeast can be tough to get rid of. I have known mothers who have struggled with these problems for months, and it is NOT fun.

My pediatrician, who is not conservative, said he truthfully wishes they wouldn't routinely test people, since the risk is so small, but knowing that I am positive, he does recommend that I do the treatment and stay the 36 hours. So after mulling over declining the treatment and/or having the antibiotics but leaving earlier than 36 AMA, I have decided to just go ahead and do it, to be safe. The only problem I can see is that with a short labor, I may not be ABLE to get there 4-6 hours ahead of time and receive at least 2 doses of antibiotic. Oh well, we'll just see how it goes.

Appointment updates: Baby is head down, feels like at least 9 pounds according to my doctor. I had sugar in my urine, so doctor suggested a nonstress test since I'd had gestational diabetes in a previous pregnancy. I really wasn't feeling well that day, think it was a minor stomach virus, and I'd slept terribly and been up since 4am, so that could have raised my blood sugar. I did the nonstress test but had to interrupt it numerous times due to K, who was with me, and at 16 months can't really be expected to behave well or obey when his mama is strapped to a chair! He decimated the room. In the end I had to unhook the belts myself and rush out without checking out or saying goodbye, because it was time to get T from preschool and neither the doctor or nurse had returned, although more than 20 minutes had passed. I'm sure the test was pretty useless, since the data was really messed up by all the jumping around I did. I'm not worried though, baby is moving a lot and I have tested my blood sugar at home several times since then and the levels were fine.

She offered to try to strip my membranes and get labor going, but I wasn't ready! And feeling as yucky as I was, it just wasn't the day to do that. Normally I'm dying to go early, but I had a lot yet to do. Since I was having a lot of contractions that day anyway, the first thing I did was to come home and get out and clean up the carseat and wash the baby clothes, just in case!
We talked about doing it next week, but since then I read that stripping the membranes increases the risk of the baby becoming infected with Group B Strep, so that really isn't option (and my doctor should have known that!)

Fall

Recently Chris at The Big Yellow House and Gretchen at A House Full of Boys posted pictures of their neighborhoods in fall color. Inspired by them, here is a photo of the old stone wall in front of my house (SE Michigan)--at the end of the driveway, actually, and some of the colorful trees around it. It was more dramatic, but many of the leaves have already fallen off these trees before I got out there to take the photo.



These are photos of my 2 sweeties who are at home during the day, T and K, in the leaves.



Fall is my favorite season, and all of the time I lived in Arizona I longed for it each October in a physical way. It just felt wrong for it to be 95-100 until Halloween. I am so happy that we have returned to Michigan!

Not to be Trifled With

I am currently in the stage of pregnancy that should be known as "Woman Not to be Trifled WIth." My threshold for irritation is VERY low. This wasn't helped by D going out of town for 5 days, including the weekend.

Friday I awoke to my dog, who has a sensitive stomach, having had diarrhea all over the carpet. I have had issues with this poor animal for a while now (she has numerous behavior problems in addition to a weak stomach), and I totally lost it, called D. and suggested that we take her to a shelter that afternoon. He rightly felt that this was rash, and that we would regret it, so she is still here and we are seeking another home for her.


Saturday went like this:

7:00am Say goodbye to D, who is leaving for a business trip to the west coast.
7:15am Wake up J, who has to leave for a soccer game at 7:45am.
8:30am Meet with potential car buyers.
9:30am Drive L to soccer game
12pm Washing machine repairman arrives
12:30pm Furniture is delivered


Good news! I sold the car! I even dickered and cut a deal. They are picking it up tomorrow.

While standing outside cutting the car deal, the meter man came to read the meter, and the stopped to regale the buyers and I with a story of how the aforementioned dog chased him and behaved extremely threatening on a previous visit, but our other dog ran interference, distracting the mean dog and escorting him back to his car.

Predictably, the washing machine behaved perfectly normal while the repair man was here, so I paid $73 for a service call during which he did nothing! If the problem resumes, he will come back for no charge except parts, but still....

Then the furniture store delivered the WRONG mattress. I had specifically chosen a mattress without a pillowtop, and this mattress had a LARGE spongy pillowtop. I informed the deliveryman that this was the wrong mattress. He pointed out that 1) My old mattress (which they remove for free) was now outside, wet and dirty and 2) they would not be able to bring me another mattress today and 3) once the mattress has been unwrapped (it had been) it cannot be returned or resold/reused, so whether or not I slept on it didn't matter, because that mattress had become useless unless I kept it. He also reminded me that the store has a 30 day satisfaction guarantee, so exchanging it for another mattress would not be a problem.

I called the salesman, who suggested I come into the store and choose which mattress I REALLY wanted. He was unable to accept that I really didn't order the one they delivered. Later that evening, with 5 kids in tow, I did visit the store. The salesman was very friendly, but did argue with me about which mattress I ordered. He claimed that I was laying on the mattress when he wrote the name down. I assured him that I hadn't tried out any pillowtops because I didn't want one! Luckily, he only went one round with me and then said "We want you to be happy, so show me which mattress you want." There it was, in the same spot in the store as I remembered, and the same price as the other mattress. So next Sat. they will deliver the correct mattress and take the other one, probably to the dump! The wastefulness of that sickens me, although I know they must do that to conform with health laws.

Mostly I was astonished that he would argue with a woman 8.5 months pregnant, late on a Sat. evening, when she has 5 kids in tow.

Excitement and Cancellations while Negotiating with a 1 Year Old

You would think I'd never had a toddler before, based on today's episodes. K, who is 16 months old, had previously shown an aversion to wearing a perfectly adorable pair of overalls. He will wear other overalls, but not these. Currently, however, my washing machine is broken, so the clothing choices are limited. He began to scream when I tried to put them on him, but I persisted, forcibly dressing him. He progressed to crying and yanking on the cuffs. These overalls are tan with plaid cuffs, and the cuffs are the issue. When I finished dressing him, he threw himself on the floor, sobbing. Of course this occurred as we were attempting to hurry out the door to preschool, and were already late. I left him in the bedroom, and after a few minutes he picked himself up and followed me into the kitchen. Once we were out the door he perked up, but unfortunately, from his vantage point in his carseat he had a good view of his ankles, and this set him off again.

I am baffled by this! At what age do children become aware of their clothing, let alone have a preference? I have never had a child pay any attention until they got close to the age of 2.

After leaving the preschool, we headed to the furniture store, where I had been yesterday, scoping out bedroom furniture. They were having a "no money down, no interest, and no payments for 2 years" sale that ends today, so D. had agreed to meet me there and see what I'd selected. (We love using their money for free, and always pay it off before the deadline). K was still crying, so I plyed him with Teddy Grahams, which shut him right up. D liked my furniture selection, and somehow, although I had intended to purchase a bedframe, mattresses, 2 nightstands and possibly an armoire, we ended up with those items AND the matching dresser and chest. Unnerving to spend a lot more than I planned, but exciting to have bought an entire room full of matching furniture for the first time ever! It will be delivered Saturday.

I rushed back toward home to pick up J from school because she had an orthodontist appointment. When we got into the BRAND NEW van outside the school and pulled away, the way the van drove felt different--no pickup, and when I looked at the instrument panel, the engine light was on! I consulted the manual which said that this could be caused by totally running out of fuel and driving the vehicle empty (I didn't think that was possible) or a myriad of other problems that must be solved by the professionals at the service department of the dealership. I was low on fuel yesterday, but not totally empty, and the problem occurred today, many miles after I put fuel in. I called the service department of the dealership, because I wanted to know if I could continue to drive it without causing further damage. I was told it was safe to drive unless the engine light is flashing, which it is not, and that the problem might be that the fuel cap wasn't screwed on tightly. I checked this and rescrewed it but the engine light remained on.

A call to the orthodontist was next, to determine if they could still see J, even though we would now be rather late. Of course not! We need to reschedule (they make appointments at least a month in advance). J was now missing lunch at school, so we picked up sub sandwiches and a slice of pizza for K and went to the park to eat. I put some pop in K's sippy cup because it was all I had, and didn't even have water to dilute it with. He refused to eat pizza, which he normally loves.

The exciting part about lunch with J was that I got to find out how she did in the spelling bee-2nd place in the entire 5th grade! She gets to attend both the school spelling bee, which will be 5th and 6th grade, and the regional bee. I was so happy for her.

After lunch, I took J back to school, and had a little time to kill before preschool ended, so bought a few Christmas gifts, which made me feel productive. We retrieved T from preschool, and on our way home, I put the gas pedal to the floor, and the van would not go over 55mph.

K had a yogurt and took a nap. When I went to pick up J from soccer practice, I realized we'd made another mistake: today was a piano party at her piano teacher's and I'd planned to pick her up early from soccer so she could attend it, but I had forgotten, as had J. It would have been more than half over by the time I could get her there, so she decided to just skip it entirely. On the way home from picking her up, the van drove normally, accelerating easily over 55mph, although the engine light was still on.

We had an extremely minimalist dinner, hamburgers on bread instead of buns, no side dishes. Dessert was caramel apples. K, who had had a few Cheezits and part of a donut as a snack, would not eat the hamburger, which I anticipated since he doesn't each much meat. He then ate a few bites of leftover pasta. When it came time for the caramel apples, he wanted one. He doesn't really have the teeth for either apples or caramel, so I planned to sit him on my lap and let him lick mine. Oh no, that was not at all acceptable: he wanted to sit in his highchair and expected his own apple. I cut off a small piece of mine, but that was no good either. Then I realized, he wanted it on a stick! I stuck an extra stick in his piece and he was happy, and was able to do a better job of chewing up the apple than I predicted.


Today my 1 year old ate the following:

1 bowl of maple and brown sugar oatmeal
1 cup of whole milk
1 small package teddy grahams
1/2 cup Sierra Mist pop
1 whole milk vanilla yogurt
1/2 cinnamon sugar covered pumkin donut
few Cheezits
Few bites pasta
1/2 Caramel apple

Doesn't look too healthy, does it? Not to mention high in sugar.

K also mildly objected to his blanket sleeper, but got over it quickly. The amazing thing about all of today's negotiations and arguments with him is that he cannot talk! This was all done nonverbally. He does point and gesture, and do things like get a plate or bowl out of the cupboard and present it to me, or climb into his own highchair, and of course scream, cry and run away. It's amazing how well he communicates with no words. His verbal understanding is excellent--I can tell him it's time for bed, or ask him if he's hungry or thirsty, or tell him to go get something and he totally understands. The few words he says so far don't help: hi, bye, various names of family members.

Rainy Day

Being as though it was a cold, rainy day today, I decided to go to the mall, something I only do 2 or 3 times a year. My sister sent the kids some belated birthday gifts, which were adorable and expensive clothing, all in a size too big, but she thoughtfully included gift receipts. There were no parking spots near the door, and we didn't have umbrellas, so we got a little cold and wet. The girls and I went, and unfortunately had to take K, as D had to work in the morning. In the past he has been happy to ride in the stroller for short periods of time, provided there is good people watching and he has a snack. Not today.

At our first stop, the Children's Place, I had difficulty finding the same clothes in a smaller size, but did find a winter jacket and a blanket sleeper (known as a bunny suit at our house) for K. I eventually asked for help, and did end up being able to exchange the clothes for the same items in a smaller size. They were now on sale, so I even saved a few $$ since the gift receipt entitled me to be credited for the full price that my sister had paid. During this stop K kept throwing himself on the floor, running all around, and generally misbehaving.

So we went to have lunch at Olga's, a favorite of mine. Rather pricey for what it is, but I like it. T loved her 3 cheese sandwich, but I and J barely touched their burgers. I enjoyed mine, and K made a mess of his PB&J. J, the potato queen, ate a lot of french fries and we all slurped down the fresh squeezed lemonade.

Now K was happy to ride! As usual, I guess he had been hungry. Eddie Bauer, our next stop, was at the opposite end of the mall. It was easy to find the shirt and exchange it for a smaller size.

Next we needed to buy a gift for J's friend who was having a sleepover birthday party tonight. She doesn't know her friend that well, and wasn't sure what to get, so we went to the Discovery Store, where there were lots of cool things, but most of them more than she wanted to spend. We are on an increased allowance program where the kids now purchase things like gifts for friends with their own money. Eventually she settled on a scratch notebook, where the pages are black but when scratched color underneath is exposed.

We were now running late to get home, because J had a soccer game to play, and of course I made a wrong turn in the mall, because I was getting tired. We usually enter through Sears, but today we entered through JCPenney, which is at the opposite end of the mall. I remembered this just as we got close to Sears.

I, the Shopper, was now pouting that she hadn't had a chance to buy anything, and when I say anything, that's what I mean: she will buy anything. She is 7 and doesn't have much impulse control yet. She was so busy playing with the remote control vehicles on display at the Discovery Store that she didn't look around, and was mad when I said we had to go (not that she needed a keychain anyway) once J had completed her purchase.

Finally, at the van! Now I remembered why I rarely go to the mall.

As we arrived home, an old friend from AZ called, who I haven't spoken to in close to a year, and we chatted for a while.

I. invited her friend M over, but M needed a ride, and I agreed to go pick her up so that I could satisfy my craving for a white chocolate cafe mocha at the coffee shop on the way.

Once home, highly sugared and caffeined, I took on the clothes sorting project. I was able to do about 75% of them in about an hour! I am so happy. Then I made chicken noodle soup for dinner, while washing down the filthy fronts of my cabinets. The only bummer of today was that the washer leaked AGAIN, after I was just about caught up on laundry, soaking all the clean clothes awaiting folding, which will have to be rewashed! AAGH! We aren't sure what is causing the problem, it has happened 3 times in the past 2 weeks, but not every load. D thinks it is a clogged drain, which he will check out tomorrow.

Now M is spending the night, since we have an empty bed while J is at the sleepover party.

All kids are now watching movies, Chicken Run for the little girls and Dumb and Dumberer for the boys, and when the little girls are in bed, D and I will watch Mystic River, if we can stay awake!

Frantic Nesting

With 5 official weeks of pregnancy to go, probably 6, I have entered the frantic nesting phase.

I have the following goals to complete before this baby arrives:

1) Christmas shopping--I have actually begun, have 5 extended family gifts, most of K's (toddlers are easy), and finally some ideas for the rest of the crew. D. and I have decided that our gift to one another will be a new bed! We are sleeping on a saggy, almost 10 year old mattress and box springs, on the floor. Very collegish, but now that we are 40 and 41, married for 17 years, perhaps it is time to acquire an actual bedframe/headboard and new mattress/boxsprings to go with it.

2) Clean basement refrigerator--I refuse to state how long it has been, but can you say EWWWWW?

3) Clean out medicine closet--I have a very deep long closet in the bathroom with 3 shelves, most of which can't be reached, extremely dusty and full of stuff I don't need or is outdated. I have been waiting for allergy season to end before tackling this, since I was sneezing so much already.

4) Complete filing--I have a year's worth of kid papers that I am saving that need to go into their individual files.

5) Catch up on photo albums--about a year behind.

6) Put away outgrown clothes into totes--currently they are in garbage bags awaiting sorting and putting away.

Sounds like a lot, but refrigerator and medicine closet are each one day jobs, filing also. Photo albums could be 3-5 evenings worth and clothes, let's say 2-3 days. Problem is, most of these chores can't be done with K awake, and I need to nap when he does. I have arranged a babysitter to do some of the Christmas shopping.



Tonight I made a seasonal favorite, pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. Sounds weird, but they are SO good! Have yet to meet anyone who doesn't like them. A soft cookie and the chips usually remain soft as well, slightly cinnamon--MMMMM!

The Girls and K

The Girls and K
Originally uploaded by PaulaK.

These are my 3 daughters, J and I and T, and little brother K.

Our Old Stone House

Our Old Stone House
Originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is the front view of our house, built in 1862.

Paula's belly

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Originally uploaded by PaulaK.

Here I am, looking large and pregnant.

Our New Sprinter

IMG_2110.JPG
Originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is our new van.

Side view of house

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Originally uploaded by PaulaK.

This is the side we enter from, using the left door.

Large and Forgetful

The title refers to me, large and forgetful. I feel like I got a lot larger this week, am really straining my clothes and even from my point of view, my belly sticks further out horizontally. Perhaps the baby has dropped some, so it is lower and sticking out more, but it doesn't feel like it. In addition, I've had heartburn the past few days. Last night it was bad during the night, so I took Tums, which coat my mouth with a most disgusting taste, which is still there today, 18 hours later, even after brushing and flossing.

The forgetful part actually refers to last week, when not once, but twice, I forgot to pick up a child at the right time and place. The first incident was when I went to pick up D from soccer practice at 4:45pm, and was alarmed to see that no one was there, only to then realize that it was Tuesday, not Monday, and I was supposed to have picked him up at 4:00pm from a trombone lesson at a different location. He was rather annoyed with me, especially since I laughed when I told him why I was an hour late.

The second incident was Thursday, when I picked up J from her piano lesson and took her to her soccer game, an unusual occurrence on a weeknight. Usually she stays until both her piano lesson and I's are done and I pick them both up. Then I took L to his soccer practice, and was heading home, when D called me from home to say that the piano teacher had called and was wondering when I planned to come back and get I. Her lesson had ended 30 minutes earlier. I think I confused myself into thinking I'd already done the piano lesson pickup, since normally I only go there twice, not 3 times. Ugh! I was mortified and had to apologize profusely to the piano teacher. I was nonplussed, however.

I think I am trying to do to many things at once!