Sweaty Relapse

Tuesday I felt great, and was even thinking to myself that I probably wouldn't need to use the inhaler for the full 2 weeks the doctor prescribed. Wednesday I awoke feeling tired and was having a lot more truble breathing. By midday I had the bodyaches and was feeling real,ly bad. Worried that the previous week's illness had morphed into bronchitis or something else serious, I made a doctor appointment for that afternoon.

You can imagine how thrilled I was when the nurse entered the examining room sporting a cough as bad as mine, and proceeded to cough violently several times while taking my vitals. She did turn away from me, but still, especially considering the fact that I had baby A. with me, I cringed. Next entered the doctor, wearing a mask over her face! She said, "Normally I'd shake your hand, but I'm coming down with something and am trying not to spread it." I appreciate her concern, but I'd rather not have seen either of those medical professionals. She concluded that I must have caught a new bug. She did give me a prescription for an antiobiotic, in case I got worse over the next few days.

I stopped at the mill on the way home for rabbit food. By now I had the chills and climbing in and out of our tall van and lifting A's seat in and out seemed almost impossible. I filled a bag with bulk rabbit food, and was confused by the fact that it only held 5 pounds, when they usually hold 10, yet looked like the same type of bag they always have. So I asked the clerk if they'd gotten new bags, and she said yes. She said if I wanted more rabbit food I could get 2 bags full. I told her that I was truthfully too tired to carry 2. She said she'd carry it for me (which they always do at the mill) and I started to tear up! That just sometimes happens to me when I feel really bad and someone is nice to me. I told her I wasn't feeling well, and she said she could tell that when I walked in. Then she told me the best deal was a 25 pound bag instead of bulk and I said I'd take that, and she carried it to my car. I fought back the tears but could tell she was looking at me curiously.

I shivered all through the night, and by morning had a fever (which I hadn't had the day before, even though I had the chills, and was wearing my long johns under my clothes and cranked the heat up). D. left for work as usual, just pausing to wake me up. I called him to discuss the possibility of him coming home and he said "Are you totally unable to function?" (Is it a sin to with an illness upon your husband?) I called my babysitter, who came and took K. to her house. L. was home sick anyway and T. was thrilled to sit and watch endless TV with him. By late that afternoon I was still feverish, but Tylenol was now working on the fever, so while properly drugged I felt OK, albeit rather sweaty. The chills returned when the drugs wore off. D. returned home from work to find me upstairs in the rec room, working on the bills, holding a baby and surrounded by other kids playing a loud game involving pillows and stuffed animals. Working on the bills often makes me sweat anyway, so it seemed like an appropriate way to spend the time.

Concert

Monday night we attended the Eric Bibb concert that I'd given D. tickets to as a birthday gift. My parents babysat and the kids had a good time with them.

The show was excellent--it's so much fun to see live music, to feel that connection with the artist. This concert was at the Ark in Ann Arbor, a small intimate venue where even the last row are good seats. A. was very good, until she began cooing along with one song, actually in pitch and rythmically. D. thougt this would bother others around us, although it was adorable, so I took her and stood in the back. At the intermission we moved to the back row so she wouldn't bother anyone. The woman we had been sitting next to told me she thought the cooing was cute, too. Men!

Shower

Sunday I felt about 50% better, and since the shower had been postponed due to the weather on Saturday, I was able to go on Sunday. Roads were plowed but still a little slow going, and I'd slept late because I was tired, so I showed up about 30 minutes late.

It was just one of those times when I felt really out of place. I parent a lot differently than this crowd and we live a lot differently. Some examples of things we do that none of them do: unmedicated childbirth, breastfeeding, stay-at-home mom, eating healthy (try to avoid processed foods, fast food, tons of soda and other sugar, etc.), no TV in our family room and not watching it much, college education.

The bride-to-be is 20, went to a one year certificate program at the local community college, and will be living very near the small town she grew up in. Her fiance, who is a contractor, has already found them a house (a spec house that he built that hasn't sold and the owner is willing to sell it back to him with good terms). She is already talking about the type of furniture she wants, which the older women have pointed out is just like her mother's, because that's all she knows. Her entire life seems preordained, and I think it's a shame that she won't be having any adventures or experiencing anything of life other than the way she grew up.

Most of the gifts she received at this shower were tupperware, a laundry basket full of cleaning supplies, and other storage containers. At a previous shower I was told she received mostly linens. No unique gifts or pretty things.

Another Snow Boy

IMG_2310, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

L. decided to come in, too.

Done!

IMG_2307, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

K. was happy to come in and get undressed, red nose and all.

A Little Help from My Brother

IMG_2304, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

K. gets some needed assistance from L. in the deep snow.

How Deep Is This Stuff?

IMG_2303, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

We had another major snowfall today.

Sweet Smile

Sweet Smile, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

As you can see from those chubby cheeks, she loves nursing!

Laughing!

Laughing!, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I'm a happy girl!

2 Months Old!

2 Months Old!, originally uploaded by PaulaK.

I can't believe how fast it's flown by. She loves to coo and goo at us--I think she'll be quite a talker some day! If I'm holding her but paying attention to something else, (like the computer?) she will start "talking" to get my attention.

Gradually Sicker

Last week the kids had a plague virus--high fever for 4-5 days and a very goopy nose. I was pleased not to get it. This week I have been getting very gradually sicker each day, an unusual onset of illness. By Wed. I was feeling pretty yucky in the morning, but had arranged a friend to babysit K while I went shopping for a shower gift at Kohl's and then to Old Navy to try on clothes for myself. It was snowing hard in the morning and traffic was terrible. D. called and advised me to stay home, or to just go to the very nice gift shop in town and get her a unique gift, rather than something from her registry (which I prefer anyway). I took this advice, and had a restful morning at home with only my baby. Around 11am I started to feel better, then ran into town and purchased a pretty vase made of amber bottle glass with bubbles in it. I also ordered a hand painted tile with a picture of a bride and groom painted on it to be personalized with their names and wedding date. I was VERY pleased with myself for finding a unique and special wedding gift AND killing 2 birds with one stone.

I then ran to the post office and mailed back some of the clothes I have been ordering myself. I need an outfit to wear to the wedding that I can nurse in and is flattering (haven't found one yet, and will probably wear something I already own that I've worn a million times but looks nice and is free). I have a bad habit of ordering many more clothes than I intend to keep, trying them on in the comfort of my home and sending most or all back. I will only keep something if I REALLY like it or it was REALLY cheap. I justify this by saying that the cost of shipping is about equal to the cost of hiring a babysitter so that I can go to the store and try on clothes, not to mention the energy saved--literal energy in gasoline and my personal energy schlepping around in the snow with a baby.

I felt good enough that evening to go to my book club and out to dinner with a friend. We discussed Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse 5" which I didn't read but went anyway.

Thursday morning I felt yucky again. My sister came to visit, stayed into the late afternoon so I couldn't nap. I never felt any better, and worse by bedtime. During the night I felt feverish and I could tell I was wheezing.

Saw my doctor today for my postpartum checkup (good as new! lol) and as she is a family practicioner she also listened to my chest and prescribed a steroid inhaler. She also commented that I probably have mild asthma which is why I wheeze when I get a respiratory illness. I was diagnosed with asthma in highschool, when I had pneumonia or bronchitis several times a year, but haven't had any problems for 20 years, until Fall 2003 when I had a bad bout of bronchitis. I don't want to continue to have this problem!

I was supposed to head to my MIL's (one hour drive away) this afternoon with my 4 daughters to spend the night and help decorate for dh's niece's bridal shower, which is tomorrow, and which I am a co-hostess of, along with 3 SILs and one aunt on the other side of her family. We agreed to each bring a dish or 2 for an appetizer/dessert theme. I made my dessert yesterday, tiny mini-cheesecakes using a mini vanilla wafer as the crust and baked in mini muffin pans. Very easy and very yummy. I also bought veggies and ranch dip to cut up.

By the time I got home from the dr. and pharmacy in the BITTER cold, I felt awful, so I decided to stay home. D. said he could take the 3 older girls (A. stays with me, of course) to MIL's to help and deliver my food contributiions (he forgot the gift). He decided to stop and see a friend, however, so I am stll waiting for him to return with food and videos. The older boys are getting impatient and somehow it seems that it would have been easier to go than to get stuck watching the BUSY 19 month old--not very restful. I am trying hard not to be irritated (it is now 8:30pm and he's been gone since 4pm) but not succeeding! He is never very helpful when I'm sick. If the tables were turned, he'd be whining up a storm that I wasn't back yet.

If I feel good enough tomorrow I will go to the shower.

Sunday a nice older couple with a nervous/neurotic Great Dane are coming to see Heidi! They are interested in adopting her.

Heidi update

Upon returning home from renting a steam cleaner for the 2nd time, I discovered that she had barfed a sock up on the wood floor, an entire sock unchewed and undigested. I called the vet to see if it was OK to give her some stomach medication I had on hand. She said yes, and that some dogs just do that (eat socks). She seemed to find it humorous.

The next day she pooped on the wood floor downstairs during the day (baby gate was shut blocking her way to the upstairs playroom she prefers), while I was in the other room changing a diaper. It wasn't diarrhea and she didn't attempt to get me to let her out. Since then we have tried to keep her outdoors all day, and made her sleep in the basement at night.

Today she was outside all day except for 2 occasions. The first time she got in when someone came to the door, and I let her stay in, and she was in the same room as me, but soon it began to stink really badly. Presumably she was passing gas, and I put her back out. Later she got in again, was in for about an hour, during which time I watched her closely. Then I forgot, and during the time it took to heat and eat a bowl of leftoever pesto pasta, she went upstairs again to the same room (she always does it in one room) and diarrhead all over. I smelled it immediately and ran upstairs, hoping it was just more farts. After putting her out I discovered the mess. This time I called the professional carpet cleaners, since after the 2nd steam cleaning the smell didn't totally disappear, so I thought it needed a better quality cleaning.


Total so far:

2 steam cleaner rentals: $32
1 professional cleaning and deodorizing: $85
Time and energy spent: priceless

The Culprit--Now Available For Adoption

Yesterday when I returned home from renting the steam cleaner, I discovered that she had vomited in my absence. Apparently she had eaten a sock. At least it was on the wood floor and easy to clean up. My sister, who at one time showed an interest in adopting her, but has since acquired a 2nd dog and feels that 2 is enough, had provided me with some information about the Michigan German Shepherd Rescue organization. They help refer dogs to potential new owners. So I contacted them yesterday.

If she were to live in a controlled environment, where she was an indoor dog who went on walks and didn't have the opportunity to eat nonfood items, the problem would be under control. If she were indoors all the time, she also wouldn't feel the need to scratch the doors.

Her name is Heidi, she is 7 years old, and available for adoption in SE Michigan.

Still Awesome

Even though I've done it 7 times now, I am still humbled by the miracle of life. Here in my arms is this amazing newborn, a complete and perfect person, who began as a speck, a single cell afloat in my body. There, with a lot of help from God, the ultimate Creator, I grew that cell into a human being. I watched her emerge, pushed out by me, and yet it is still hard to believe, when I look at her, that she came entirely from my body, every ounce of her (except the DNA contributed by her father, of course!) Matter created from nothing it seems, although the reality is that I turned food into a living being. And now, for this brief and wonderful time, she continues to be entirely grown and nurtured by me, by energy from my body in the form of breastmilk.

I am so blessed and thrilled to have her, the ultimate gift from God. A new baby is a miracle that never loses it's magic, it's newness, no matter how many times you watch it happen.

Dogs!!

One of our dogs has a weak stomach, and every few months has an episode of diarrhea on the upstairs carpet. She also has a number of neuroses and behavior problems. Last time it happened I came unglued and wanted to take her to the shelter. Dh said that was rash, and we agreed to seek another home for her (she is 7, a long haired German Shepherd, sweet temperament, arthritis in her hips). We got her when she was 1 year old from the Phoenix Eye Dog Foundation. Her fears had made her unsuitable for a seeing eye dog, although they had spent 4 months training her in the hopes she would overcome them.

So it happened again Saturday night, and we made the kids clean it up since they have promised to take responsibility if we don't get rid of her. Then dh rented a steam cleaner and cleaned it up. The kids just told me she did it AGAIN last night. I just don't feel I can face it. Ugh!

She can't live outdoors because she is afraid of thunder, loud noises, etc. and prefers to be indoors so she claws the doors up trying to get in, doing a lot of damage. We could get a doghouse and chain her up, but that is no life for her.

I hate her and this situation.

Snow Days and Sick Kids

We have now had 4 snow days, 2 last week and 2 the week before. I was wrong, however, and we get 5 before going extra days in June, so one more to spare. Last Wednesdays snow day it was warm, rainy and foggy late in the day. We assumed that there would be school, so big kids were out waiting for the bus. We were the only district in our county without school. The superintendent fielded a lot of complaints about this, but apparently the back roads were still icy from the snow that fell the day before. They are putting our children's safety first, which I applaud, and it doesn't really inconvenience me, but it was still hard to believe we had no school that day when snow was all gone and (most) roads were clear!

This weekend I have been trying to pull together dressup clothes for the kids for a family wedding in February. I. is the flower girl, so Grandma is sewing her dress, and L. still fits into his First Communion shirt and pants and tie. I bought J. a cute dress on ebay and will buy one for T. today.

D. has grown another 2 inches since September, and is now about 5'8", an inch taller than me at age 12! He needs a sport coat, pants and a shirt, but can wear Daryl's dress shoes. A. can probably wear a red velvet Hanna Anderson dress I splurged on when I. was 3 months old to wear to a family wedding. K. can also wear hand-me-down clothes that L. wore to that wedding--cords and a button down shirt.

Last Thursday K. came down with a fever and a major goopy nose, is still sick now, and T. got it yesterday. I hope that A. doesn't get it!

Snow Day

Had one today, even though there wasn't too much snow. May have another one tomorrow, expecting a lot more snow and possible sleet/freezing rain during the night. Kids are excited, but they only get 2 and then it's extra days in June, and I guarantee they won't be excited then! I love having them home, made me wish I homeschooled.

I was able to take down the remaining Christmas decorations and made a triple batch of Kathy's banana bread.

Sick Baby

We went to bed on Sunday night and A. seemed fine. She had a cold and low grade fever earlier in the week, and I'd taken her to the doctor, but she seemed to have recovered. She woke at 3am as usual. I'd heard her snuffling in her sleep, but once she was awake she began coughing, the barking croup cough. I have had a child with croup before, but not that came on so dramatically in the middle of the night, and not a 6 week old infant.

After each round of coughing, she would pause breathing and then take a big gasping breath. In between coughs she seemed OK, but would start coughing again if not held in a vertical position or if she cried at all. She was able to nurse, held at an angle, and her nose was clear, nothing to suction. I observed her chest for signs of labored breathing known as Stridor, and thought I saw one or two of those type of breaths, but wasn't sure. She was coughing, crying and wiggling, making it hard to tell.

I called my doctor's office and spoke to the nurse on call. She told me to take her to the emergency room to be assessed if I had any doubts or if I even thought I saw the indrawing breathing known as Stridor. I wanted D to come with me but that would mean leaving the kids alone and he was against it. I was afraid that she might have a big coughing fit in the car and stop breathing and I'd need to get her out of her carseat. Also, when frazzled my driving skills plummet. But I went alone at 4am. It is a 15 minute drive and she cried and coughed once but then went to sleep. The ER was dead, so we were seen immediately. Of course, her symptoms had now completely ceased. I almost wished she'd cry to elicit a cough. She only coughed once the entire time, and the doctor wasn't in the room. He was very nice, and said that this was very typical, that croup symptoms subside after the person has been awake for an hour, and that taking her out in the cold air may have helped contribute to her improvement. He gave her a dose of a steroid medication, mixed with apple juice that I fed to her with an eyedropper. This is a new protocol for croup--a single dose of steroid. It has been found to lessen the severity of coughing spells and the duration of the illness.

I arrived home at 6:30am and went back to bed for an hour. The next day was OK. A. slept most of the day, and I took her to the pediatrician. They gave me guidelines for when to take her in the steamy bathroom followed by a walk in the cold outdoors, when to visit the ER, and when to call 911. The next night her breathing was OK, no coughing spells, but she was awake half the night. After 2 nights of 4 hours sleep each, I was now feeling a bit fried, and hung out in pajama clothes/sweats all day. Thankfully the next night she slept much better. She is still coughing today--not improved or worsened. Praying it doesn't happen again. It is hard not to panic with a baby so small.

Happy New Year!!

I'm not making any resolutions, except to continue to try and be the best person--mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend--that I can be.

New Year's Eve was very low key. Made everyone get up early and clean and take down the Christmas tree, refusing them breakfast until it was done. Then we went out to breakfast. Spent the rest of the day waiting for old, dear friends to arrive from Kansas City, enroute to Connecticut where they were moving to that weekend!, They finally showed up at 7pm. Then we had burgers for dinner, and just hung out and visited until midnight. I was ready to drop before the ball did! LOL They were exhausted too, so once we settled our total of 12 children in bed, we went right to sleep.

We had a great time the rest of the visit. Lots of good food, a long walk, some geocaching, lots of fireworks set off by the preteen and teen boys, and a fabulous dinner out--just adults and A! We asked D and A if they would be A's godparents, and they said yes, so will plan a baptism in Connecticut this summer when we vacation out east and visit them.

We were sad when they left Sunday afternoon after mass.